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Limerick(s) of the Week

"Tomorrow" Guy

By Gerard DiLeoPublished 10 months ago Updated 9 months ago 1 min read
"I'll never drink again..."

Awash in acetaldehyde

From fermented spirits imbibed

My vasopressin's crashed

And I'm quite unabashed

To piss life away bleary-eyed

***

My liver has of late complained

That its function can't be maintained

By flooding it with liquor

That just makes it sicker

Until my eyes are pallid, yellow-stained

***

I'm by no means a chick magnet

And won't get better looking, abstinent

But after a few

And a few more, too

I'm the best lookin' guy on the planet

***

My glomerular filtration rate

Is off the scales and won't abate

My A1C

Is too high to see

I wake up with two chicks and a headache

***

"I'll never drink again,"

Says the man with regrets when he's sane

But that man just can't be

A man who's tonight's me

Tomorrow I switch au champagne

humor

About the Creator

Gerard DiLeo

Retired, not tired. In Life Phase II: Living and writing from a decommissioned church in Hull, MA. (Phase I was New Orleans and everything that entails. Hippocampus, behave!

https://www.amazon.com/Gerard-DiLeo/e/B00JE6LL2W/

[email protected]

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Comments (3)

  • Rob Angeli10 months ago

    Lol, champagne's even worse, in all those ways!

  • Hahahahahaha it happens all the time!

  • 😆😉👍❤️📝💯👌

Gerard DiLeoWritten by Gerard DiLeo

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