Larger than Life

I feel pretty and larger than life.

Everyone is looking at me in awe.

My mother is backstage, I saw,

Holding my talent show tripe.

Now it’s time to put on a show,

And show the judges what I am made of.

The practice and hardship has paid off,

They write a score down on the paper below.

I received the results and a happy ending,

A trophy and a pat to months of sacrifice.

Now I start weeks of work and sacrifice,

This cycle of competition is never ending.

I didn’t choose to do this, that I know for sure.

It’s all I’ve known since I can remember.

If I was any other way, I’d remember.

My wish is to escape and no more to endure.

One thing I am grateful for is my hectic life.

If it weren’t for it I’d sit up more nights to cry.

Why not say something? Why do I lie?

I have no choice to build myself a better life.

My mama lives her dreams through me.

She loves me and sees all I can achieve.

I have to trust her through this life’s reprieve.

She sees something in me that’ll set her free.

I am still young but I feel old and tired.

The attention and recognition are great.

So why do I feel that my lifestyle is a threat?

Why are all of my achievements uninspired?

Sometimes I’ll walk home slow after school,

So I can look around at other families.

Children playing carefree and muddy.

No adult telling them what they can’t do.

Now that I am adult I see my potential.

I keep myself preoccupied and busy,

So I’m too tired to see what I’m missing.

At least everyone else thinks I’m special.

I’m old and retired now and my life is silent.

All my friends and acquaintances are gone.

I can’t distract myself with what’s to be done.

My regrets keep me up at night in the quiet.