In the Park

I was sitting in the park the other day

and I overheard this couple

she was telling him his personality

just didn't have the spark she needed

Normally it is my policy not to get involved

in these types of situations

but the poor young fellow seemed so

out of it and distraught with love that

I couldn't help but get into it

As I moved closer to the situation

the young man was attempting to

explain his feelings for her

he seemed extremely nervous

and his thoughts were haphazard

and before he could conclude

she interrupted him with, I told you I just can't relate to

you on that level

and you know I prefer that you didn't even bring up such

things

At this point, I enter the scene

Look here, I say, you tell this poor

boy his personality has no spark

yet you don't

allow him to be himself

or to tell you his true feelings

you force him into a state of

artifice based on

his confusion

as to what you want

you subvert the very thing

that would allow his true

spark to flare

I say back off

The young man looks grateful

for my involvement

but she, on the other hand

shoves her hand into her purse

coming up with a canister of pepper spray

the spray sends me into a swirling fit

of pain as I hear her say,

scummy bagman, mind your own

business, come on let's get out of

here

As I convulse on the ground

I realize there was a good reason

for my policy of nonintervention

ah to be young again . . . .