IGNITE YOUR SOUL WITH PASSION OR BURN YOUR AURA TO ASHES

I am a Leo so according to astrologers I should like the color orange.

Despite this and my attraction to all colors, the one I really love is pink.

When I'm myself all shades of pink work because I'm olive skin toned.

When I nearly lost myself to my profession only the right shade of pink worked because I turned grey and white.

Pink doesn’t usually look good on those who are exhausted, but it always looks great on those who are rested.

When I'd seldomly sleep a full night for more than one night in a row I'd wake up olive skin toned.

I’d call loved ones more often when olive skin toned because it meant I had enough energy to almost show them I care.

I got trapped in a saga of never-ending stress, pressure and deadlines that resulted in a difficult, consequential saga surrounding my personal life.

The details sound better when they're spared.

My heart gets heavy at the thought of the hurt I caused loved ones.

Anxiety often inhibits my body at the thought of losing them before I could spend enough quality time with them.

My heart also gets heavy when I think of all the times Lola took a deep breath as she looked at me with her big black eyes of despair and drooping half Beagle, half Jack Russel ears while seemingly pondering about when her next opportunity to have fun would be.

I nonetheless consider myself to be a good dog mom and she's had at least the same amount of fun times as I considering her regular attendance at all my seldom social activities in addition to our duo dancing and tug of war in the living room on olive skin tone days.

They say when you can’t or won’t play with your pets you should at least talk to them.

I’ve often apologized to her as I explained things along the lines of: “Mommy’s tired she'll play with you tomorrow when she’s done what she needs to do”, “Mommy’s trapped but don’t worry she sees the light” and “Mommy will buy you a house with a backyard before you’re too old to care”.

I’m pretty sure she’s already barked back to say I'm the girl who cried wolf.

It would make sense considering I often thought the saga was over when it wasn’t.

Now it is but the best is yet to come.

Grey and white come with stress, pain, anxiety and exhaustion.

For some reason I thought they were my calling and I defended the idea with force.

For some other reason when I decided to be a criminal defense lawyer I envisioned hard work but also a sun tan, fun and love throughout it.

Hard work was never lacking.

I seldomly had a golden tan and fun until I ran out of exhaust.

My reasonable loved ones reassured me they loved me despite my absence which some throughout certain periods harshly deemed to be unforgivable.

Some told me to find a new profession and I'd get defensive because I was in denial and I had a plan.

I was in denial because I love defending constitutional rights and I’m good at it.

I was in denial because I love trying to understand psychological math behind crimes.

I was in denial because I love to learn, read and write.

I was in denial because I thought it was prestige and power.

I was in denial because I thought it was the only way to better the justice system.

I was in denial because I morphed into an acute perfectionist.

I have a passion for criminal law but my dream life also involves living to the fullest, loving, laughing, giving, writing, teaching, arts and crafts, nature, animal shelters, business diversity and the ocean in warm weather the majority of the time while doing the rest.

I always knew this but I never envisioned hard work being so rough and negatively powerful, nor did I factor in the possibility of hurting anyone but myself along the way.

I must've assumed I had superpowers or that I could drive excessively over the speed limit without getting caught.

It sometimes made me look self-centered and materialistic, especially because I was also longly in denial of my exhaustion.

My lifestyle had nothing to do with income despite the beauty of my overzealous dreams because detailed billing takes too much time either way.

It had to do with the trap.

Being a perfectionist with a passion for criminal law can be incompatible, but it doesn't have to be.

If it’s incompatible but it lights your soul on fire, mold it.

It can feel astonishingly empowering.

Spirituality can help.

Astrology and numerology are science.

Spirit guides protect you if you let them.

All you can't do is what you can't control.

When it comes to the justice system, only the highest rulers in the judicial and political hierarchies can control the outcome.

It's hard to handle for a Leo, but some of the actors within it who are focused on positive change manage to keep my passion alive.

Grey skin is usually a sign of sickness or unwellness.

White skin is only beautiful when it's not exhaustion.

Tanned skin is gorgeous no matter what.

Pink is vibrant.

Leo is a fire sign.

Deep rooted perfectionism isn’t compatible with pink unless you fuel the fire right.

My aura probably went from almost black to rainbow toned.

It took a lot of time and energy.

It took no longer justifying.

It took accepting.

It took respecting my soul.

It took faith.

If pink makes you pulsate, all shades should work as long as you're kind to yourself.

In any case, fulfilment is a panoply of bright, colorful energy.

Energy colors auras.

Dark and black auras stem from missing or troubled souls and exhaustion.

As long as you ignite your soul with passion your aura will never burn to ashes.

Effort, experience, time and patience are of an essence.

Breathe, stretch, shake.

Do it for you.

Do it for those you love.

Do what feels good.

Do what feels right.

Dream and disregard those who call you crazy.

Know your worth when it gets undermined.

A kiss with a slap is better than none.

No one knows what’s good for you better than you do.

No one knows who you are better than you do.

There’s no need to explain.

Stay in control.

Mind over matter.

Be true.

Be you.

Believe.

Live.

____________________________________________________ "Color is Pride: True Colors" Vocal Media poetry challenge [2021-05-16]