Fear

Fear

On a windy day she sat at the beach, sand slapping her face,

The salt she could easily taste.

Her heart was breaking, and her reality was just out of reach.

Still struggling with what I could have become, instead of what I am.

I had goals, and I had dreams that I worked so hard to achieve.

Instead I now am nothing, guess I should have stuck to the plan.

I heard you can achieve all your dreams by facing your fears.

By experiencing the doubt and the disbelief and pushing through all your tears.

FEAR…….

I wrote every one of my fears into the sand, and watched the ocean wash them away.

I wish it was really easy, that fear just disappeared with the tide each day.

It is not spending every day with you that I am afraid of. I was totally committed the moment I saw you.

It is handing over my hopes, my dreams, every single piece of me, and standing back to see what you will do.

There is the fear of telling you everything inside me because I am afraid it is too ugly to hear.

That is what it all boils down to:

I guess I am afraid of FEAR

I fear the things I do not understand, I fear the feelings I have never felt.

My biggest fear is of the unknown, and what cards I will be dealt.

My biggest hope is that you will love me through life’s biggest storm’s like the rain.

I just hope we can be there for each other, even after all the years of pain.

HOPE…

It is what I struggle with each day, it is the role that I try to downplay.

The source of conflict withing myself, what I would rather forget and put up on a shelf.

It is the storms before the reward, the battle, force, knife, and sword.

It is what I look for when everything is falling apart.

It is the version of me we both know I have,

What I need to come back from, everything that turned bad.

It is that voice I keep hearing morning, noon, and night.

Reminding me to keep going, not to give up without a fight.