Brother, I Have Arrived Back Home Now

This was my first goodish writing bit but because of a recent loss, I didn't want to share it where their close family would see it. This post was sad enough for me to write, the day after I finished editing this, I had found out about the loss. It still shakes the family up, so naturally, I just try not to speak of it, I try not to write about it.

- Kait Nathalie

Approximately, 3,500 suicides take place in Canada every year.

Some of the people who have taken their own life

will never be able to explore the world

never be able to listen to music and dance in their kitchen

never be able to see the happiness in the faces of their loved ones.

Some have never done any of these

Some have always done everything

Some have already said their goodbyes

Some are too hopeless to keep living

Some are a lot like me

As children, many of us would fall

Into the colorful autumn leaves

Because it was comforting to not know

The cruel harsh truth

The tree I once climbed

Is now dead and stapled with police tape

They cut the rope and

Carry his body away

My big brother had committed suicide

Approximately, 3,501 suicides take place in Canada every year

It’s morning but I’ve never slept

All I had was flashbacks

And this infinite numbness

I stayed up

Looking at the stars

I stayed up

To see the lightning flash

Beyond the dark clouds

I stayed up

Because it was too painful

I looked out of my window

To see the tree once again

The leaves have fallen

But they are no longer leaves

They’re the ashes of my brother

And the blades I used to

Mend my shattered soul

For the first time

I feel at peace

For the first time

I’ve accepted the gray mist

Approximately, 3,502 suicides take place in Canada every year.

Two ivory tombstones placed together

I am home now, big brother.