Bluffing

"Can I buy you a drink?"

🍺

💭 ... if I promise not to tell you what I think... 💭

🍻

💭 ... ... ... 💭

⚡

💭 You're out of my league.

"I could be everything you need."

💭 I open with my usual attempt to persuade:

"You should drink hard liquor & get laid."

😉

⚡

💭 Everybody is turned on by confidence

"You know I'm so fly!"

💭 Saying that always feels so arrogant

Thank God I'm so high! ⚡😎👍

⚡

"I'm a true bad ass!"

💭 And if you believe that, you're a total dumb ass!

⚡

"I'm not too old for you!

"Daddy was sent here to serve!"

💭 I'm totally too old for you

with baggage and issues and bullshit you do not deserve.

⚡

"So...

"Yo!

"Let's go,"

💭 Ho 💭

⚡

"Youth before beauty!

"Don't worry, I'll follow!"

💭 Your ass is a cutie.

I wonder: do you swallow?

⚡

❗👀❗

"Sure, I've been to plenty of cribs like yours."

💭 Never⚡ in my all wildest imaginings⚡have I've ever seen any place like yours❗

⚡

💭 What the holy fuck is that thing used for?!?❗🫣❓

"Absolutely, I know what that is used for!"

💭 ... ... ... 💭

😱

⚡

"Of course, I can do this."

💭 I don't know if I can do this!

" 'Where will this lead?' 🤷

"I'm clueless."

"But no doubt: we'll feel more alive,"

💭 if we survive.

⚡ ⚡ ⚡ ⚡

"We can take it slow

"and let it grow."

💭 Let's go really fast!

This probably won't last!!!

"We should keep our heads.

"We don't need to jump straight into bed."

💭 Let's get drunk and mindlessly fuck and suck and fuck and fuck and fuck,

then take a break for snacks

🍓🍇🍫 🧁 🥯

🌮🌮🍷🍾 🍩🥨

🍅🍅 🌶🥜 🍑 🍆 🍌 🌭

🥠 🍹🍸

🍒

and then get drunker and smoke weed

and sucksucksucksuckSUCK!!!

and fuckfuckfuckFUCKFUCK and

💭 F U C K❗💭 !!! 💭

......

and fuck a couple more times for good luck

...... 💭

⚡ 🛏 ⚡

"I can go all night! Call me 'Mister Steady!'"

💭 Shit!

I'm going to cum already!

🫤

⚡

"I'll get over it; it's fine;

"I actually feel blessed."

💭 You just exhibited every known sign

of not being impressed.

<sigh>

"Doesn't surprise me."

💭 The final question always is the same: 💭

Will you ultimately despise me?

Do you think I'm lame?

❓

⚡

💭 Your eyes are like knives!

Baby, retract those claws!

I don't have hives -- {currently}

Breathe! Take a pause!

⚡

"Look, I'm serious!"

💭 You're looking at me like I did something hilarious.

"We could always try this again."

😐 💭 Hello, Laughter, my old friend.

~by

________________Bolt⚡

I tried two different tones for the Things You Can't Say Out Loud challenge.

Humor 😂☝ & Heartbreak 😢👇