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Bloody Haiku

just saying like

By Brenton FPublished 5 months ago Updated 5 months ago 1 min read
14

all those bloody haikus

they are always way too short

just enough hook to reel you in

but not enough to get really caught

i don’t know about anyone else

a bit ripped off is how i feel

a frenzied seventeen syllable starburst

and then nothing but the still

(tumbleweeds and crickets)

but once you're five syllables in

there’s no turning back

it’s like wanting a meal

but getting a snack

five seven five

so much less is so much more

ahhh the mysterious east

it’s a Zen thing i am sure

hats off to all of those practitioners

of this form of literary art

who said it best said it for less

a winnowing of words from the start

there’s no right there’s no wrong

there’s no plot there’s no long

there just is

om

.

.

.

In closing I would like to quote one of Australia's greatest philosophical minds, tried to find a video or a sound clip of His Royal Rodneyness (Get Rude on, Get Rude on) but couldn't:

"No No No, Fuckin No!" Rodney Rude

Get Rude on!

Peace and Grins People

art
14

About the Creator

Brenton F

I've beared no sick words

Junk words, love words

Fuck you words from Jesus

Lowlife: Jesus and Mary Chain

- - -

I have an eBook, a collection of my favourite pieces

Link to Amazon

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Comments (10)

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  • Thavien Yliaster3 months ago

    Dear Brenton F, Will You grant me the permission to use Your poem, "Bloody Haiku," in a video? Sincerely, Thavien Yliaster

  • L.C. Schäfer5 months ago

    "a winnowing of words" - I love that 😁

  • Who said it best, said it for less. I loved that line the most! Lol, that quote at the end!

  • Phil Flannery5 months ago

    I hate Haiku and avoid it when it comes up. I've never thought myself a poet, but it seems when the challenge is made, I can't help but have a go. Great poem Brenton.

  • Kristen Balyeat5 months ago

    Haha!!!! So good! “it’s like wanting a meal but getting a snack” Brilliant! Love this rant! 😂

  • Alex H Mittelman 5 months ago

    Fantastic Haikus! Amazing work!

  • Babs Iverson5 months ago

    Awesome lines and loved it!!!❤️❤️💕

  • This is top story stuff. It’s literary zen

  • Lamar Wiggins5 months ago

    This was fun critique on a poetic form. "it’s like wanting a meal but getting a snack" lol. Very true description! Who the heck is Rodney Rude?

  • Thavien Yliaster5 months ago

    I don't know why, but this sounds like You're (sexually) frustrated with haikus. Like just when the going gets good the good gets going. Then again, Jazzy just had a filthy haiku competition. So, that might explain some of the frustration. Mikeydred said that haikus were more like a plague though. Makes sense, I wonder though if Vocal intended the haikus to be more like an algae bloom luring in whales coming to feed on the mass amounts of krill, but instead of whales we get readers and people that are skilled with words known for winning competitions at the touch of their fingertips. "a frenzied fifteen syllable starburst" Now I want a starburst, and I've always known them to be 17, but once You get to syllable 15 the flavor's sort of already melted in Your mouth and it begins to fade as quickly as it struck. Mmmm... starburst. I always enjoyed their lemon and orange flavors.

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