Alone

6am and the sun is rising.

Still no sleep, can’t see what I see.

Heart so weak, love doesn’t feel easy.

So alone I feel so dizzy.

My heart hurts, it’s numb from all the pain

Of the past that haunts me everyday.

Had to figure it out, a child with no direction.

Can’t you see me struggle with no destination?

Wasn’t taught how to be disciplined.

Had to figure it out on my own cause they just wouldn’t listen.

Heart on fire cause I know that love is missing.

17 years old, where do I sleep?

Wanting to die every second I weap.

18 years old, I made it out but I’m still weak.

19 years old, still alone trying to figure out food for the week.

20 years old, still doesn’t know what to think.

In a relationship with someone who would lay his hands on me.

Lost a baby because he swung at me.

21 years old, realizing everything.

From the damage my père gave me,

Missing in action never came and saved me.

la mère so sad she didn’t notice me.

22 years old, found my own way.

Waking up everyday, so proud of me.

23 years old, now I have someone next to me.

Who shows me a new world that could make me happy.

Don’t feel no pain from the past that destroyed me.

I found him, now I can breathe easy.

He gave me a family to finally believe in.

Every once in a while the past sneaks up on me.

To the memories of fear that surrounds me.

So many questions, why’d this all happen to me?

So sweet and so innocent I didn’t deserve this.

No family, no friends, easy to lose confidence.

Forced to learn you make your own when the love is pure.

So fortunate, I found it, only happiness around me I swear.

I fight everyday for myself.

Couldn’t be any more proud of myself.

Came from sleeping in a laundry room,

To sleeping in a whole penthouse suite.

The love for myself goes so deep.

Got sober alone with no one to take care of me.

I’m sorry to myself, I didn’t see it sooner.

The things I’m capable of everyday getting closer.

To my dreams and goals while growing older.

Heartache nonexistent, time to wipe it off my shoulders.

Too heavy it’s weighing me down, making me colder.

Time to smile and laugh it’s time to let go.

Only happiness, I can see my future so clear.

I’m going to make a big difference in the world I swear.