a shower

brrring brrring brrring

8am the alarm yells

"wake up" i wrote

the sun is too bright

turn it off

i turn around

close my eyes again

brrring brrring brrring

8:30 the alarm yells

"make breakfast" i wrote

i'll eat later

turn it off

close my eyes again

thweep thweep thweep

the text chirps

"where are you?" he wrote

i'll answer later

another excuse, maybe

close my eyes again

mew mew mew

the cat cries

she wont stop

groan

kick the blanket away

open my eyes

step over the unfolded laundry

smell the cat litter

swat away a fly

crunch crunch crunch

the cat goes

brrring brrring brrring

10am the alarm yells

"eat breakfast" i wrote

look at the sink

i'll have to do more dishes

turn around

step over the unfolded laundry

back to bed

pull the blanket over my eyes

close my eyes again

brrring brrring brrring

not again

"take a shower" i wrote

and what if i do

what will happen

it's cozy in here

what will happen

groan

kick the blanket away

bip bip bip

the water goes

it's too cold

it's too hot

it's too much work

i don't want to

but

i'm already here

flump flump flump

all my clothes are off

same ones for five days

i feel bad for them

drips on the front

cat hair

unknown clinks in the pockets

fwoosh fwoosh fwoosh

the shower goes

i step inside

wince

close my eyes again

i feel ridiculous

i sit down

staring at the tile

i don't want to move

it's almost cozy in here

splosh splosh splosh

the water sprays

off my body

i watch it

creating bubbles

i watch it

fade the dirt from my fingernails

turn the water brown

and then disappear in the drain

tink tink tink

it sounds like a piano

an ascending scale

cascading from my fingers

sigh

it sounds like rain

a low frequency brown noise

descending from my hair

instead of the sky

sssshh, sssshh, sssshh

close my eyes again

it's a hug

from a thousand raindrops

instead of two arms

it's kisses

from a thousand raindrops

instead of lips

bmmm bmmm bmmm

i can feel my heartbeat

on rhythm with the rain

my body is present

my soul is present

i feel elevated

i take a cold breath in

hhmmmmmh

and a warm breath out

hhmmmmmmh

it's cozy in here