A letter to You

Your words are full of beauty love and warm feelings that

I can surely deeply feel but now for real is that all your talk

about the blockages being unblocked but you help to heal and later You block I work and do complete opposite I am aware with who I truly talk so I know because I feel through I see through and it is often so much of a painful discomfort but your being and your talks and your healing saved me from so many of them tyrannosaurs without open minds and hearts and

I wish to trust You more but I have experienced already your welcoming shots and believe me dear reader it killed me with a double caliber and its core

I dont know why when I am the most wrecked not even asking for help

You all are arriving from a sudden turn as if You have been missing me for so much for so many months almost years and before when I was still better where have you been ?

I think You wanted to bring me down completely and You thought I will loose my mind for Your charm but I knew from the first moment out of Your hidden look and the blue I knew these eyes and this smile

I have no idea why You suddenly burst with Love into me but I can feel

its just a bubble talk I know this love bombing sparks in Your eyes and

its not all right towards me and towards all the females helping and serving You in there especially the ones whose sensitivity is touched deeply by Your care and no care I wont be able to be sucked again by Someone like You

I have been there on and off that is truth and even if some of my favorite teachers and masters are leading me again towards Your way

They are alone making mistakes without the awareness of who

a narcissist is and what it can truly does into Your body and mind

You can not heal You can not teach the ones who carry realy

Open hearts and minds You can be just a phase a connection to something

they experience through their own path in life

I can not even trust You this way

I need to follow my heart and intuition

healing teaching practicing is a one way

but I am here because of the people and behaviours like Yours

that are playful in tunes but do not give another the room for its turn

to simply Open up as a human being with all that You have to tell about the real of the life experiences and Yes I need the real I always needed the real

so that I will know and differ all from another

I have been crossing many ways and dimensions so far

I need somebody that groundedness will save me alive

Maybe someone completely not like me at all

but with my Heart and Eyes opened unconditionally toward my soul

I know You will not care because I know people like You a lot

Narcissists don't care so they cant know and dive deep into another life heart and soul!

You have been trying to convince me and I dont know why because

I was already opened unconditionally loving the whole in Your

community pride

I experienced a lot but I can not say

that I could really fly

Whether You like it or not it is a narcissistic world full of silly lies

that are opening up most of the pandorian sugar like boxes

and we are not in control of anything at all

as when the devil comes

no matter what

He or She will make the terror directly into Your soul

but only some will know

only some will feel reaction in their body mind and soul

only some will heal to help

only some will differ

lies from the not a lie