You Made It, Believe It

Let's get right down to business, shall we?

So, the year is wrapping up pretty fast and well, we're back again. You may be tempted to look back on all the things you could have done, should have done but couldn't do...well, don't go down that rabbit hole, it doesn't lead anywhere safe

You know how we choose to beat ourselves up for all the many things we failed to do, all the many things we have unchecked on our lists for the year? Oh how we fail to see that surviving every day in this crazy world is already a feat; staying sane through all of life's challenges and storms is worth celebrating. You kept your head through it all, you didn't lose your cool and even when you did, that didn't last. You picked yourself up, dusted off and kept moving

You are stronger than you think you are, a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for. You carry yourself well, you don't walk around showing off your scars, you don't make others feel responsible for your mistakes, you take responsibility. You have felt the weight of the world on your shoulder, you have been alone one too many times and you have wondered about those who professed love and loyalty.

But through it all, you made it! 2021 is closing off on this note, whether you agree with me or not. I will not allow myself to see all the things I could have done and all the things that remain undone. It may be that time passed me by or even that, I found many things difficult in the beginning but I showed up. What matters is that, I kept trying, I didn't give up.

The list is long, oh no....several boxes have been left unchecked but I want my life to be more than checking boxes and crossing things off. I want to live every moment giving my best, if that results in checking things off the list, then so be it. If that means, I clear things off the list, then let's go on. I don't want to be caught in the activity of checking boxes and crossing things off that I miss out on the experience of learning, unlearning, and relearning.

I want to look back and see growth, I want to look back and see real tangible change. I want to look in the mirror and not be able to recognize myself; not because I have been beaten by life's many activities or been swallowed by the busyness of the day but because in the mirror, I can see who I was and who I have become. I can see the clear path of growth and can appreciate the process that led me here.

I believe there is more to life than doing what you're told and staying there; I want to become my own person, do what must be done. I want to be able to look back and say, I took this step and although I did not know the risks, I am glad I did it anyway. I choose to grow, I choose to take this one step at a time; I choose to make the most of every opportunity. Who knows? I just might get lucky, I just might surprise myself and get better...

This is who I am

I may not be where I want to be and I may not be all I thought I'd be but I am evolving

I am BECOMING!!!