When Self-Help Doesn’t Help: Doing What’s Best for You

Are you a consumer of self-help books, blogs and articles?

Do you enjoy having the latest advice from this “expert” or this “guru”?

Are you a person who uses the proposed advice but is left feeling unsatisfied afterwards?

The Problem With Self-Help

The problem with self-help tips is that sometimes it leads us to helpless ones. Sometimes we get so caught up in someone else's thoughts that we forget our own.

To be honest, what I consider to be a good health can leave you wanting more (or maybe less). What you think is too good to be considered trivial. And it is just as it should be.

Our value system, beliefs, ideas, and opinions must be ours - informed by outsiders, without hesitation, but we need to process them and make them our own.

Part of the problem with self-help tips is that we may begin to lose sight of what we see as success or success. We are so absorbed in what we read that we can begin to view it as a Holy Grail.

When I lose weight, I have to feel this way.

If I make my life easier, then I should be happy right away.

When I run a marathon, I have to feel the greatest sense of accomplishment I have ever had.

Sometimes these places act according to expectations and leave us with a deep sense of accomplishment. However, sometimes they don’t and they can lead us back to the same square, or actually make us feel worse than before.

Falling Into a Trap

Personally, I have fallen into the trap of excessive use of self-help books, blogs, and authors over the years - reading book and book but not applying the proposed changes, or applying them but feeling overwhelmed by how I felt afterward. This always led me to circles.

I take it very seriously and I like to learn easily and rethink my lifestyle, especially. In fact, if left unchecked, I would happily bury books and blogs that fall under this category all day long.

However, in my quest for perfection, I took paths that were not right for me.

One example would be to try to be smaller than I enjoy being. I read about some who live as minimalists, who give as much as they can, or who live only for fifty things, I have seen myself living the same life.

That idea helped me to reach a certain level of my lifestyle, but then I tried to push myself too far.

I liked some things, even though they were just things. I like the easy operation of the car. I love traveling on unusual trips as often as possible. I realized that a little bit was worth it, but not too much. Sounds contradictory, maybe, but hey, that's me!

Another example would be working to remember more. I have learned the work of people who seem to live in a constant state of calm. I loved this as appropriate.

I consider myself a calm and tolerant person most of the time and I see those as personal strengths, but I also have my limitations, and I am not over losing my spirit at times.

Instead of accepting this as my part, I tried to fix it. It doesn't work.

We are humans, not robots, and sometimes we run out of air. I am fully prepared for that now but it has not been for a while, as I have seen it as a weakness. What I expected would not happen, and the advice, and the explanation as much as possible, did not fit me perfectly.

Although this experience left me feeling a little discouraged at the time, it led me to a better place overall. I realized that I was the best king of my destiny in terms of my goals. I read and draw from external sources, of course, but the goals are mine.

I make the output right for me and I know that no one person has all the answers. The result is more fun, and something I can use in my life, making any changes I make so that I can always change my lifestyle rather than a five-minute fix.

Through the above process I began to realize that the problem was not the books or the authors themselves, but me and my expectations. At one point I was guilty of falling into the author's view of what a good outcome would be rather than focusing on my own needs and wants. I have worked on that.

These days, I can still be found reading pages about books that fall neatly into the development area. And my bookshelves are full of such books. I still love this genre and I write it myself in that genre.

However, I am now very clear about what I want to get from each study. I really choose who I study and what I study. I am clear about the kind of life I am trying to get into. If someone else's experience can help me get there faster, everything will be better.

What Does Success Look Like For You?

To answer that question, we first need to know:

What it is and who you are we appreciate very much

Who we want to be in life

What values ​​do we want to live by?

What kind of life do we want for ourselves?

How we want to feel when we see ourselves staring back at the mirror

We are the only ones who do not really know what our translation and lives look like.

Self-help should help. Make it your own and it may do that.

Make sure you build and support your unique vision of what good health is and do your best to make that a reality. Use the help along the way, but do not get caught up in the comparison or the other person’s view of what your health should look like.

Set up your compass and live your life to the best of your ability