To My Dearest

I know you yearn for a fresh start. But I also know you want to scrap everything and begin again when something doesn’t go your way. You fight so hard and so long on projects. Then it feels like you snap and all you want to do is to disappear. And sometimes, you do.

I want you to know that that’s okay, dearest.

Something you learned last year was to know your limits. You wondered what would happen if you kept going, so you pushed your brain to its breaking point and beyond. I know you consider yourself a lone wolf, dearest, and your circumstances may want to force you to fight all alone, all alone against everything in the world.

But, dearest, the world lies.

The new year promises those new beginnings, the new adventures that you crave. I want you to pursue them. I want this to be the year that you take a chance on what you love. I want this to be the year that you embrace yourself and all your quirks and flaws.

I’m not saying that it will be easy, dearest.

There are going to be days where it hurts. Days where you want to hide away under your blankets and sleep until next year. There will be days where the most courageous things you can do is to get out of bed and brush your teeth. When you need a reminder that everything will turn out okay in the end.

Here is your reminder, dearest. Everything is going to be okay. You are going to be okay.

I want you to dive deep this year. I want you to dive deep into your brain and tap into that river of mad creativity the courses through your soul. I want you to make your art fearlessly. You rely too much on the approval of others and I think it holds you back. I know what you want to do what you love so much that it hurts. Don’t wait for the approval of others before you begin. Give it a try now, or you might never get the chance.

Dearest, I know you often think about your productivity, and how useless you feel sometimes.

We’re going to work on that this year. But always remember, your worth is not wrapped up in your productivity. How much you get done in a day does not define you. Make those goals, dearest. Make them and complete them as best you can.

At the beginning of each year we say, “this one’s going to be different.” You look for the most radical ways to change your own life, creating unrealistic expectations, and beating yourself up when you cannot meet your lofty glass ceiling. Don’t make promises you can’t keep, dearest, but finish what you start.

When you start, start small. Take everything a little bit at a time, dearest. Each small change you make, each small thing you do, will add up. Invest in what you love to make it stronger and to hone your abilities.

After all, we all have to start somewhere, dearest.

Something else to remember, don’t compare yourself to others, dearest. Like different flowers grow at their own pace, so do different people. Make sure your roots are watered, grow where you’re planted, and bloom with your bright petals facing the warm sunshine.

Finally, always remember that you are loved, dearest. Don’t ever forget that. While other people love you, don’t forget to love yourself, because you are who you were created to be. Simply, beautifully, you.

It’s going to be a good year. Let’s make it count, dearest.