The Time to Act Is Now: Get Out There and Seize the Moment

For most of my life, I thought I had no desire for prominence.

To be honest, I was thinking it because it is true. Don't get me wrong. I had a desire to move on with my life, take a shower every day, and want to have fun at the end of my miserable days working for clients. However, no matter how sad those days were, I was not encouraged to change my lifestyle.

I have always wanted ambition, in that vague sense that is part of a great desire and a certain dismissal. I wanted it, but I thought it wasn't part of me. If I didn’t have enough ambition for ambition, what was the point?

Then I developed cancer, and I realized that sometimes things come to us in strange and frightening ways.

I was 35 years old when I was diagnosed with it. I had a bachelor's degree and was in charge of answering work, answering calls and texting. Suddenly, I contracted the disease, and what did I do with my life? What should I be proud of?

I was proud of one thing. I had a wonderful son, and from the day he was born, I had poured out my whole life to him. By the age of 14, she was very independent, and she didn't need me as much as I did.

With cancer, my motivation doesn’t need to kick right away. All decisions are for me. I had high levels of the tumor, and although I was in Phase One, my cancer specialist insisted that I needed chemotherapy, followed by radiation.

I did not realize overnight that I had a motive. It was starting to light up a bit for me.

At first it was just like I was doing what I needed to do to finish every day. Losing my hair has filled me with the decision to become an attorney and to show others what an inner beauty can look like. I did not wear my wig intentionally because I felt that hiding behind it sent a message itself, which I did not want to admit.

Cancer woke me up to the risks of my former life. One thing I came out of was that I wanted to live, and now life meant doing everything I had never really done before.

I started chemo in March 2011, followed by 33 radiation therapy. I thought my chest would fall off on my own in the end, but I ended up in July and hit the ground running.

I went back to college in August, got my bachelor’s degree in May, and was accepted to graduate school that fall. I started the program in January of this year, applied for a position as a graduate assistant. I also run a movie theater for my second job.

When I was going to be appointed to sign up with my mentor, he expressed his concern that I was doing too much, and that I was pushing myself too much.

I couldn’t explain to her what it was like to sleep at 35 years of life and suddenly I felt like you weren’t waking up for the first time. I could not explain that there was nothing so difficult when every day I felt happy, living unbelievably.

Today, I have all the inspiration I ever thought I wanted and more. I battled cancer, and if I did, I would get it again. I have plenty of time to do it, and each day is a gift.

Do I still have days of laziness? You bet I do. But my days are full of purpose now instead of longing, and so I am very happy.

I was talking to a friend of mine recently, and I told her thank you for having cancer. He could not believe that I had said that, and if I was telling the truth, neither would I, but as I said I knew it was true. Sometimes we find answers to desires that we do not even know we desire. Sometimes those answers sound like burdens to bear.

But cancer was what I needed to survive to see that life was too short to be sad. Do I recommend that everyone get cancer in order to stay healthy? Of course not, but there are themes that work for everyone.

Overcoming obstacles.

Exhaustion in the face of adversity.

Get up and go where all you want to do is rest.

My favorite saying is “You have to come for yourself.” He does it perfectly. No one or nothing can force you to do what you do not want to do.

You may drift into your life, and think you want a change. I can't tell you how to do that.

If you are a flirt, my best advice is to work on giving up your limited beliefs about what you can do.

No matter who you are, how old you are, what your life is like, you are much stronger than you think. I spent 35 years wishing I was different, and that didn't get me anywhere. Time to do it now.

Now get out there and take your minute. And when you're done with that, grab another one.