The Secret to Success

Twenty-one years old. I watch her tirelessly from the dusty floorboards beneath her bed. I hear her vacant cries about the unknown; will she find love, will her poetry ever take off, will she graduate and find a job in a city far away, will all of her twenties be spent in a global pandemic? She sits in the mirror every morning, painting her face with makeup to mask the natural beauty that beams from her aura alone. She gives herself pep-talks that she finishes with a smile at herself, but as soon as that bit is over, the emotion on her face tells you all you need to know. Life is hard and some days our mental health struggles win the battle, but I wish she knew how easily I could help her find the peace of herself she’s been lacking- confidence.

The day came, she graduated college after 4 tiring years. She had better grades than she thought, she fell in love and she felt grateful for all the people she met and memories made. Again, I heard the cries, except they weren’t vacant this time- they were real. She cried about leaving the man she loved 500 miles across the state, she cried about leaving her crooked-floored apartment, she cried about the scarcity of actually picking up and moving across the country for a life opposed to an education. She had the whole world in her hands and she seemed to have dropped it all when she had to say goodbye to the small, snowy town she called home for four years. These were all the more reasons as to why she needed me- and on moving day I think she realized that; she packed me up in a box and chose to take me with her instead of abandoning me to the curb.

She returned to her childhood home and was on a high of sweet nostalgia for two weeks, but that feeling quickly dissipated into the same vacant cries I heard from the floorboards. The only difference this time around was that it was crunch-time, she felt rushed to take the reigns of her life, she didn’t want to get left behind by anyone or anything. She sat in front of her mirror and didn’t have to force a smile back- it just appeared there. It was like a northern light of hope flickered within her, she found the answer to all her problems… it was me. Without a second thought, she ran to her garage to rummage through the box of lost and found things from her college life, where she found me coated in the dust that laid beneath her. “Ahhh,” she exclaimed, “my little black book of secrets and songs and poetry and jokes- you’re still nearly half empty, that must change!” She ripped me open and began writing until her hands calloused and her brain gave in for a night's rest. I woke up on the floor next to her bed, afraid that I was looking at my new home- but as the sun rose, so did she and I was picked up and placed on her night stand. Little did I know, this was the beginning of a different road for the girl I have known. Down this road she would find happiness in herself, solitude from her mental health struggles, creative ideas for her career, passion for the “scary” future, and above all- confidence. She used to write for a grade about something she was never sure of. I inspired her to write for a peace of mind- and that is the secret to success.

When you find peace with yourself you are wealthy in more ways than you could have ever imagined. She was finally able to save her goal of $20,000 dollars and start her life in a new city far away, she had the world cusped right back in the palm of her hands for the first time in what felt like forever. She was right on track to where she wanted to be. I never got a formal thank you, but I got a new forever home at the table at her bedside. It’s amazing what a little confidence and an outlet can do for one when the world feels like it is crumbling at their feet- I just hope she doesn’t forget about me and all the amazing capabilities she has within her.