Spiritual Awakening

As a person who has sufferred 35 years of abuse by various people in my life you can imagine the amount of toxic stress released into my body. As a result of this I suffer from Fibromyalgia and Functional Neurological Disorder, I am 39 years old. I worked as a carer for 17+ years and then went to uni and graduated as a nurse in 2013, unfortunatley I was signed off work in Jun 2020 due to ongoing seizures. It was during this time I realised how much I had neglected my own self-care needs because I was too focused on caring for others. It was then I decided I was going to put myself first for a change, not in a selfish way but in a way that made my own wellness matter especially my emotional health. As a sufferer of PTSD this is very important in order to live a relatively normal life, so I started to meditate. I lit candles, used oil burners that sent the aroma of Laveneder through the house and played music that was aimed at balancing all my chakras. Not knowing what these were I started to study and research so I had all the right information so I could do it right. I also used to be a negative thinker my therapist told me that this was my thoughts and all the negative things I had been told almost my entire life. I am not my thoughts I am not my thoughts I kept telling myself in my head. It was during this time something started to happen to me, I just felt different. I was no longer in an abusive relationship I had finally found a loving man who dotes on me, he has helped me heal immensely. As it was nearing xmas time my stress levels hightened so I started doing 2 meditations per day once in the morning usually aimed at healing and keeping my chakras aligned and the other one I did at night before I fell asleep. I had no idea the amount of guided meditations and music there were there are litarally thousands and thousands. I noticed one on meeting your spirit guides I did this one for 7 days before bed, I had an encounter with spirit my best friend who sadly died but they told me everything was gonna be alright, I felt so calm and warm, after this my intuition got better and my level of conciousness opened up and my third eye opened up for sure, if anyone is interested in meditation I would highly recommend it.

I was going through a spiritual awakening and at first it felt scary but I am much more settled now. As new year approached I promised myself a meditation living room I bought buddas, candle burners, floor cushions, led lights that go right around the livingroom skirting board it truly is a wonderful space. Once I started to get more into meditation I began to look into tarot cards and bought healing crystals. My partner thought I was going mad but I told him I was changing into a new me, a better me. The girl that started 2020 was a negative thinker, she would put herself down and recite negative words in her head for no apparent reason, I was allowing my thoughts to influence me and not in a good way. The girl that enters 2021 is a girl who is caring for herself for the first time in her life, her thoughts are positive and believe me when I say positive thinking changes everything, it raises your vibrations and attracts better things in life. It really does. My promise to myself going into a new year was to continue to be positive and love myself for me, which I do now. If I can do this anyone can, being a positive thinker really makes a difference in life and it also helps emotional wellbeing, I am now trying to reach out and help others who have gone through similar experiences in life, we are not our thoughts and it is important for anyone to realise this as our thoughts can be very damaging to our wellbeing, I urge people to try and think positive and to be kind to themselves, look up water crystals and how they change their pattern when exposed to negative words and positive words it is eveident to see how the crystals change the ones that have had positive words recited to it has stunning patterns were the ones that have had negative words recited to it the crystals look flat and diformed. We are 75% made up of water molecules and so it has a similar effect on us a better effect in my opinion. By doing this self-care I have had a positive effect not only on myself but my children and my partner who has started to meditate with me, I also do it with my youngest son, it is a great bonding expereience.

I can truly say for the 1st time in my life I have a positive outlook on life and good things are starting to happen, I feel so abundant and thankful for eveything I have in my life and its all down to self-care and thinking positively. So I urge everyone care for yourself, love yourself, be kind to yourself, remember you are not your thoughts or any of the negative comments people might say especially if your in an abusive relationship or have abusive parents, tell yourself positive things each day and watch how your life changes. Don't let anyone take your smile!