Questions to find my best self

What do I love about my life?

I love that no matter what I do weather I succeed or fail I have family and friends that are always supportive.

What am I afraid to do?

I’m afraid to leave my home (unless I go out in the car with my fiancé) I’m not sure why I’m afraid of this. It could be because of all the dangers and infections of the world, it could be judgement from staring strangers, it could be just being out in public scared I’m going to do something stupid; it could be all of these things or none of them it’s hard to get to the root of my problems.

What makes me upset?

My own mind, my own thoughts. They tell me things that could and couldn’t be true. They play with all my insecurities.

How can I add to my happiness?

Stop caring what people think about me, be more confident, stop allowing my fears to control my life, to just be happy in general. All easier said than done.

What do I love doing?

Photography, writing, reading, spending time with my fiancé, talking to my mother even if its just texting random weird things, getting cuddles from my fur babies (after we had our car crash all I wanted to do was visit my mother and our fur babies I got so many cuddles and kisses).

What are 5 things I love about myself?

My weird brain, it comes up with the most random things that make everyone including my self laugh. My eyes, after taking some close-up photos of my eyes I realised just how pretty they are with the colours. My tattoos and piercings they all mean something to me and that show me that I can and have been fearless sometimes. My creativity, it still shocks me to this day the things my brain can come up with. My hair, I never let anyone go near it even though I haven’t always taken the best care of it, but others get scissor happy around my hair and I do not look good with short hair.

What are 5 things that make me smile?

My fiancé.

My mother

My family in general

My doggies

The fact I actually published a book and am working on more the progress makes me happy and smile.

If I could be anything in the world, what would I be?

It’s a toss up between a mermaid and an author. I love writing and I would love to one day have a best seller. But I also love swimming and anything mythological but good luck finding me a seashell bra that fits me, and I don’t like sea food so probably lean more towards an author.

If I could travel any where in the world, were would I go?

New York it’s gorgeous no matter the time of the year. There are so many amazing photography opportunities and writing opportunities.

What is my number one goal for next year?

Being so productive with my writing to make it a full time career and be financially stable, removing the stress of whether I can be helped mentally or not, this would also mean I could finally stress free get help for my condition with out having time pressure added.

If I could relive one moment in my life what would it be?

Possibly the moment my fiancé proposed to me because it was a cold night causing me to need to pee desperately causing me to try and rush him through it, I would probably tell myself to go to the toilet before we left the restaurant. it was still a perfect moment.

What are 3 negative mindsets I need to get rid of?

Thinking my fiancé is going to leave me all the time.

Comparing myself to others.

Comparing my relationships with people to other people relationships with the same people.