My Life of Ease

It was a hot summer day, I was in the middle of preparing dinner, when my husband walked into the kitchen and I burst into tears. The dam I had built up with frustration from living a façade released and I could no longer continue the path I was traveling. We were in the middle of an adoption program, we had spent thousands on medical procedures, acupuncture, acupressure, nutritionists, herbalists, and blood draws in our attempts to conceive. We quit our careers to start our own business, we were running through our savings, and I was in an internal battle of doubt and fear. My husband held me while I cried but even his loving embrace wasn’t enough to ease the turmoil inside.

It was during this time that I found Empowered Abundance Collective (EAC.) Their retreats intrigued me with topics on manifestation, the law of attraction, and manipulating the world around me. Things I had never entertained before. In my mind, eccentric people and hippies talked about manifesting. Communes were filled with people who manipulated situations to be provided for, rather than working for their possessions. I scoffed at psychics and people with intuitive gifts. I was familiar with the law of averages and working hard for everything I had, yet I found myself saying yes when offered an opportunity to attend a retreat. I was at the end of my rope knowing I couldn’t sustain the battle inside me or the desires I craved. The ease of how life could be is what drew me toward the EAC, as I was fighting my way through the life I was living.

I grew up living off the land of hard work. Five generations prior homesteaded and began passing down knowledge and love for cultivating property. It wasn’t something to take for granted and to ensure a healthy harvest, a full season’s work was required. I carried preconceived beliefs that anything worth having would come at a price, therefore opening myself to be willing to manifest with ease was foreign. It appeared to take the work out of obtaining one’s desires and I didn’t feel equipped to participate. I had friends however, who appeared to manifest as easily as blinking their eye. My friend Julie was someone born with an innate intuitive gift. Doors opened for her at the exact right moment, and she floated through life with ease. She would win contests and drawings or be randomly selected to move into first class plane seats while boarding. I, on the other hand, was a martyr slaving my way to my desires instead of loving my life for the things that were in it. However, I have learned that I too can manifest the life I’ve always dreamed of and I can enjoy the process of achieving my desires.

The second practice in Emphory is "There is only One Power and it is Benevolent." As I dig into the meaning behind this practice, I see the stuck beliefs that I wasn’t capable of manifesting because I wasn’t hippie enough, eccentric enough, lucky enough begin to shift. I may not know the stories behind where these beliefs came from, but by separating the stories from the meaning I assigned them, I can grow in understanding the benevolence of the One Power and I can see that I am capable of opening doors in ways I never thought possible. In my paradigm, God is the only One Power, and if I truly believe God is benevolent, then working hard is not a prerequisite to obtaining my desires. I can see new possibilities for my relationship with God, relying on Him without the need to toil in decisions.

About a year and half ago, I received a call from a Reiki Master who had an upcoming class with one spot remaining. She hadn’t finished asking if I wanted the spot when my entire being leapt at the opportunity. Something inside me answered, as my cognitive mind did not have time to chime in. I have learned that leaping at opportunities is how God speaks to me and how I can let go of previous beliefs of old stories. The previous version of me, who fought my way through life, would have laid out pros and cons of taking the class. I would have contemplated what the time commitment was, how much it cost, and what I could gain from obtaining a certification in order to determine its worth. I would have questioned my entire Reiki future before making a decision to take the class or not.

Before that call, I had never considered becoming a Reiki practitioner. By following God’s guidance and believing He is truly benevolent, I found a calling that brings me tremendous joy. I have learned to love the life I am currently living and, by doing so, have created a lifestyle of having the things I desire most. God has shown me it doesn’t matter if I’m a hippie, eccentric, or lucky because His love is in all of us. Now, instead of sifting through turmoil, I remember there is only One Power and I choose to love the path I’m on stepping into the gifts that He brings my way. My relationship with God now encompasses all that He is because He is the Only One Power and I know He is Benevolent.