Maybe It's Maybelline, Maybe it's Adult ADHD: An Update

Hello, and welcome, to my first official update of my new years resolution to attempt to find a routine that works for me, the life I want, and my brain wires.

This is week 3 and I have had 0 weeks of following the schedule 7/7 days. I did anticipate this -- I figured primarily due to changes in the schedule format. That's a little true but mostly it's been difficult mental health days and a fun lil IBS flare up to knock off the routine.

Let's back up a beat. Here's what my 'planned' schedule has been for the last three weeks:

MWF

12-8 am work

8-9 am self-care

9-10:45 am cleaning/organizing

11-12 lunch

12-2 pm relax with partner/work on projects at their home

2-3 wind-down routine (shower, lotion, medications, brush teeth, hair and skin care etc)

3-3:30 pm tik tok

3:30 -11pm sleep

TH

Basically identical except the 9-10:45 am is reading time.

Weekends I haven't shaped yet, except I pick out my outfits on Sunday for the week.

Successes!

1. I have followed the schedule 5/7 days each week AKA THE MAJORITY OF DAYS!

2. My living room including nooks, crannies, baskets, any storage, have all been sorted and organized.

3. I have more energy to get more done.

4. I have less anxiety because things have their time to be worked on and don't nag my mind as incessantly.

Lessons

1. Things don't get done unless I schedule them …

2. and set a reminder if it's not in the normal routine.

3. I left Saturday as unstructured because I thought I'd struggle with so much structure and for 3 weeks Saturdays have been my least favorite day.

4. Success begets success. The more I follow the routine and organize my world the more calm and clarity I feel.

Frustrations

1. Slowing down.

I have never identified as hyperactive or impatient. I have periodically gotten frustrated with cleaning because it's taking SO LONG. Then I remember how throughout my life I've only ever cleaned in a all at once marathon frenzy over a Saturday. Then not done it again for months. I also recognize that out of sight, out of mind has been a "cleaning solution" which is how toilet paper ends up on my bookshelf and crafting beads end up with my finances.

2. That routines have to adapt

I understand (and have lived) that mental health days and physical illness will impact my 'regular' routine. I worry about adaptation because that feels like the onramp to derailing to me because my brain, right now, does not know how to prioritize urgency well. Right now I'm trusting the process but I do not care for the need for adaptation.

3. I have more blind spots than I knew

I had a zoom call with some friends I haven't seen in YEARS. YEARS. Put it in my ADHD app that makes doing tasks fun and quest like. Felt real confident.

Did not open app on the day of the call. In fact, did not see my phone, for close to a day because Saturday is my unstructured day (not for long) so it didn't occur to me to check any of the systems that keep me organized or accountable. I just hopped along from rabbit hole to rabbit hole.

4. I do not do well with unstructured time

I can handle chunks of time being broadly labeled; reading or creative time, relaxing time and fill that with things that fit in that category but free for all time? nope. Just a string of half started and half started projects.

Revisions

1. Officially adding self-care time to the first hour of my time post work.

2. Remove tik-tok time before sleep and replace with reading.

3. Add laundry and dishes to Saturday to give structure as well as creative activity time. I get the most replenishment from it.

4. Friday 9-11am will be for any calls or follow up tasks with friend of family that I have 'meant to do' but haven't done.

I'll check back in a few more weeks. I continue to be hopeful.