Living My Life Blind

I live my life blind, plain and simple. This is different from person to person, as you can tell on the news, in social media, writers, entertainers, and celebrities. What I mean by living blind is pretty simple but before I get into that and how that is my passion, let me regale a few tales that kick-started me into this way of thinking.

It started like any other day. I woke up to my mom telling me to get up and get dressed for school. I was probably around eight or nine at this time. It was a snowy day, the kind of day I loved and still live for, even though I now live in the desert, yuck. I usually walked to school most days from my babysitters’ house. It was maybe a mile or less, I don’t remember but I loved the walk. Walking through the snow and feeling it hit my face and just seeing all of that splendor of untouched snow made the walk take longer than usual. The occasional snowball fight with friends or the neighborhood hooligan, figuring out where the best fort locations will be for later that day, after school that is. I had, to me, an awesome arm, so not too many kids wanted to let up on me when we had snowball fights. I could probably clear a parking lot with accuracy. Suddenly, I feel this pain in my back and I am now face down into the same snow I was just admiring a second ago. Ah yes, the daily bully that would take out their life’s frustrations on me. Fun times. Poor, poor me, right? Wrong and I will get into that more later but for now….

This type of thing happened….almost every day. I would just be walking along, enjoying the weather, and just loving being a kid and then BAM, hit again. Knocked down again. Kicked again. Crying again and just not understanding what I had done to deserve this type of behavior. I was a kid. The type of kid that did not want to sit down or take a nap or stay inside. My mother always told me, “I can tell when you are sick. You sit down for more that it takes you to eat something.” She did know me on that aspect. So, why did this keep happening and why was no one trying to help me out? Hang up with the pity party company. This is not about pity or boo hoos. This is one aspect of why became blind.

After feeling like this would never end, I used one thing that always helped me out, my brain. See, my mom and I had moved and some days I would take the bus and some days I would walk home. I would tell these bullies that I was taking the bus on the days I was walking and they would wait for me at the bus drop off at school buuuuuut, I never got off the bus. I walked in. On the days they thought I took the bus, I would walk home but take a different route. Instead of waiting for me to get out, they would be ahead of me and they wouldn’t think of looking for me. Easy fix.

Fast forward a few years and my mom and I moved to South Carolina. Again, just wanting to be a kid, I loved how beautiful this state was. The history. The beaches. The people, some of them. After growing up as the punching bag, I figured that I would try to reinvent myself a little. Try to act “cool” and just see how it went. Well, that lasted for about a month or so and what happened? I will give you three guesses and the first two don’t count.

You guessed it, another bully issue. I would walk down the halls, being my usual shy, quiet self and I would get slapped upside the head and pushed all the way to my class. Fun times, right? Again, hang up the phone, this will all make sense soon enough. About four to five months into the school year, this stopped. The reason is another story altogether. The fact is, it stopped and things seemed to be going up from there and then……..

We moved to Texas after that school year was up. Yay me. Finally got a girlfriend and we move!!?? Awesome mom. Way to go. You can laugh, it is funny how little we actually know as kids as to how life works sometimes.

Anywho, we move there and move in with family for about the first year there. Totally new place. Same types of people. Not all but the few that I ran into, just think of Nam vets and their flashbacks. I figure, new school, new me. I try out for football and make it. One point to yours truly. I was always running around and playing rough, so why not.

A month into the school year, trash-talking with a teammate, as you do. He decides to take it personally that the new kid was talking trash better and he decided to blind me with a punch. Needless to say, it was the same stuff, different day, or so I thought.

See, up until this moment, I thought I was pretty weak, in the fighting department. Oh, I lost that fight, do get it twisted but I did find out that I could take a punch. Even one that was, how did a friend put it, “One that came from the deep south and ran up to Canada.” He swung back and down and brought this one right across my left eye. I did not see it coming because I just returned his trash talk in a better way. As I turned to see his reaction, I felt it instead. My first reaction was, “Great. Just great. What a good start to the new you.” Well, little did I know that it was one of my first steps into being better.

Skip a few more bullying incidents and I changed schools. The first one was a poor school and the new one was actually our rival in the district and a richer school. Again, new school, new me. I made friends pretty quickly at that school and quit football to get a job. I started working out more and punching a bag to get my frustrations out. It worked. After about a month of working out every day, I would work out a body part a day and the seventh day was cardio and more punching bag, my friends would ask me if I had any more weed on me. I did not smoke then, hell, I did not smoke or drink until after I graduated school. The point is that I chilled waaaaaaaaay out. Almost overnight, or it seemed that way. This is where everything that has happened to me, up to this point, all came together.

I became blind at that moment. I was blind to how people treated me. I did not stand for it anymore and instead of turning into that which I hated, I became blind to their insecurities and just changed their perceptions through……….hippy part coming up…….being me and showing them that I accepted them and did not judge their life or what issues they had in their life. I was blind to all of that and got to show them that not all people judge. I called them out on their BS but I never judged them.

I, once again, changed back to the poorer school and that mentality stayed with me. Totally changed how I was viewed by people. I was truly blind and by being blind, I found my true passion in life. That passion is just being human. I never understood why people had to treat others badly. Whether they hated their clothes, what they read or watched or loved to do etc. I never understood, and still don’t, why people felt the need to treat others like their life was not worth respecting. I am here to tell you that it is worth it and YOU are worth it.

Flash forward to me being an “adult”, per se. I stayed at my job and worked my way up to manager. I was now in charge of other people. They had to listen to ME!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA…….hahaha. Anyway, I approached this job the same way I approached life. No one is different, it is their attitude that seems to always be the problem. Helping them to see that they are better than their attitudes filled me with happiness. Tapping into someone’s talents was awesome to me. Seeing them leave work happy and having fun was always something I strove for. Now that did not always work, of course. This is not Pleasantville or a sitcom. Life happens. To everyone.

Now, take a look at what is the main news stories. What types of stories fill social media these days. Racism. Hatred. Justified bullying. Why is that? I still don’t get it because I am blind to what causes each of these things.

Before we go further, I want you to understand one thing: I am not perfect. I have a temper. I have emotions that get the best of me. I struggle daily with my philosophy. I strive every day to just be…….human. To be me and help anyone I come across to realize that no one is the same. We are each different and we are wired to deal with things differently. Hence why there is not a single diet, diet pill, or workout that works for EVERYONE. We are all different and yet, we are all the same.

What I went through is nothing compared to, say, some who comes from an alcoholic family or someone who was trafficked for whatever reason or someone who grew up poorer than I did or maybe they were born with a defect or whatever the reason is. That is not the point. The point is, why do we allow these things to define us?

Here is more detail on what I just wrote for your reading pleasure. I am a white male. I have been bullied by numerous races, mainly white. South Carolina: a black kid I ended up making friends with. Texas: Mexican, white, black, you name it. Hatred comes from any race and sex. Simple, hard truth. I have had friends tell me I should be different by what happened to me. My response was always, “Why?” Why should I be different? Why should I let my past define me and why should it rule over my mindset? Ridiculous, in my opinion. I was a kid who loved life. Loved, and still do, nature and people. You want to impress me in life? Tell me about you. Tell me about your culture. Your beliefs. Let me pick your brain and let me get to know YOU. I could care less what your skin color is or what country you were born in. Plain and simple.

This is my passion. This is what I want to share with the world. We all have dreams and goals and loves and hobbies that others might find stupid. So what. You be you, always. From my experience, people only treat others badly because they are missing something in their life that you have and they are jealous of it. That is on them, not you. You are responsible for yourself and you only. Even if you have a family and kids. If you don’t love who you are, how is anyone else. This past year has taught me that most of what people covet is nothing worthwhile. Many people have had their eyes opened to this and that brings happiness to me. This means that being stuck at home, you were able to reflect on yourself. That is all we need and that is what I share with everyone. I am a blind man. I am blind to your skin color. I am blind to your past. Help me to open my eyes to you and only you. That is what I am passionate about, you. I am passionate about what makes you tick and to give you someone in your life who does not judge you for being you and I hope that I can spread that to every last person on Earth. I know it seems like a huge undertaking but if I can reach people and those people reach others…….well, you know what happens next. As hippyish as this might sound, this world needs more love and understanding more than it needs more hate and bullying.

So, in closing, I would like to ask you what a celebrity has to do with YOUR mindset? What does the hate being spread in the news have to do with YOUR mindset? Like Mr. Rogers’ mom always told him, look for the helpers. They are the ones that make the world a better place. Help me be one of the helpers that this world needs and won’t you share in my passion to make this world a better place for EVERYONE?

Thank you for reading this and I hope you have a great day/night.