Is there no choice in adult life?

We often say the words to comfort ourselves: "I can't help it, life is like this. The words are full of helplessness and regret as if life is a whirlpool, we are in it, we can only go with the flow, there is no choice.

For example, if we are very busy at work, we have to sacrifice our time off. We can only take the long-term value for short-term benefits. But how does it make sense, why does it become the life we are accustomed to? This is something that deserves deep reflection.

For example, in April 2021, I was so busy that I only had a day and a half off for the whole month of April and spent most weekends traveling to classes. For example, from mid-August to mid-September 2022, I was so busy that I never had a full day off, and I was busy with work and life every day, so busy that I gradually dropped my daily 10-15 minutes of exercise.

While being busy, I was gradually giving up many things, such as sports, rest, and time with my family. And taking this giving up for granted. But with a little reflection, one doubts the rationality of this choice. If we don't reflect on it in time, we'll naturally use the same strategy again whenever we're subsequently busy with work: giving up the things in our lives that are critical and have long-term value, one by one.

In my recent reflections, I have doubts about the words "no choice".

For example, if we are busy every day, are we really busy in a valuable way?

Do I have to go to all the meetings?

Do I need to make all the decisions?

Is it possible to say No to many things?

Is it possible to let go of colleagues to take responsibility?

Is it possible to speed up the pace of training young colleagues?

Is it possible to pack up immediately after the evening meeting and go home quickly, instead of dawdling in the office?

Is it possible to reduce the input of invalid information every day, especially in the hour before bedtime swipe the phone?

Can you go to bed half an hour earlier?

Can you wake up half an hour earlier?

Is it possible to use the half hour to get up earlier for aerobic exercise?

Is it more efficient to write after exercise?

Is it more efficient to work all day after exercise?

Is it possible to seize the critical and high-value things in the seemingly busy work to invest more time?

...

This list of questions can be extended over time, each seemingly sparse, but in each one, we have other options, not no options at all. All the choices add up, and life changes completely.

To give you a few examples, I've gone to sleep between 12-12:30 p.m. for a while before and tried to fall asleep after 11 p.m. one night, only to wake up naturally at 5:30 a.m. the next morning. I went out for a 30-minute super jog and ran three kilometers. Also wrote two articles after washing up. I ate breakfast at least 20 minutes earlier than usual, so I could go to the office earlier and plan my day earlier. Another example is that one day I went to bed at 10 pm because I had a cold, but I woke up at 6 pm the next day and not only recovered from the cold, but also had time to go through a book I had been wanting to read recently and solved some of the key problems I was having.

Many managers are very busy, so busy that they do not have time to reflect and learn, such a state is difficult to sustain. Recently, I shared a screenshot of a book on Knowledge Planet, in which the author exclaimed, "The Jews who survive in New York, no matter how busy they are at work during the day, still insist on going to lectures at night. Their success is no accident."

It is hard to escape from being busy and tired, as long as we work in the industry and company we can afford. If the company is not particularly "perverted", the key opportunity for change still depends on how we regulate our own physical and mental state.

On reflection, each of the issues raised above is something I can change, and I can change it today. So it seems that the dividends of changing yourself are huge and gratifying.

Adults will always have a choice. Life itself is not a whirlpool; it is the loss of the ability to be aware of life and the gradual numbness that makes it a whirlpool. If we regain our perception today and start acting today, change will happen today.