How to tame it

the one who criticizes us inside is just the part of you that needs to be loved more. ”~ Amy Leigh Mercee

We all have that sensitive and judgmental inner voice that tells us we are not good enough, we are smart enough, we are good enough, and so on.

It tells us that we are not doing anything right. It calls us stupid. It compares us to other people and speaks harshly to us and to our bodies. It tells us all the things we did or said that were “wrong” after contact or contact.

Sometimes it is used to criticize other people outside to make us feel better about ourselves. Sometimes we try to pressure our inner critic by being overly demanding, busy, and accumulating more and more things.

Sometimes it is a protective approach that tries to keep us focused on our judgment so as not to be true, because, if we are, we may be rejected and not get the love and acceptance we want.

However, by doing this, we are causing great pain and suffering because we are breaking and rejecting our essence.

Just ignoring a sensitive word does not always make it go away. It may start at the beginning, but it will soon reappear if we do not heal / accept our pain, trauma, and wounds and change our inner workings, which is where it comes from.

Have you ever heard the phrase “What we stand for?” Have you ever told an angry person to "just calm down" or a crying baby stops crying? Does it work? Not when our strength is at an all-time high.

Why is a person angry? Why is the baby crying and crying? Because something inside is causing the behavior. There is often a need or unfulfilled pain that needs attention.

Thinking of a better idea of ​​compensation can sometimes work, but sometimes it just creates an internal conflict and a lack of self-confidence because deep down we don’t believe what we are saying.

As a child, most of us have been taught to suppress such “negative” feelings because if we let them, we could be punished for doing so. Welcome at the beginning of the critical voice; it often becomes our frightening part that is damaged and asks for attention. It wants to be seen, heard, and understood.

My father used to annoy me a lot and always tell me, "Damn it, Deb, you never do anything right." Hearing that many times left a mark in my mind. I started to live with that definition of mine, and a sensitive voice kept me “stopping” from being this way.

For me, the critical voice was my father's voice and the deepest embarrassment I had for making mistakes and not doing things "right."

I had held back the suppressed anger, the sadness, the guilt, the unforgiveness, the anger, the trauma, and the pain I tried to hide with a smile on my face, but it eventually turned into a shame based on shame.

My inner voice was always critical of me when I was lacking or imperfect in terms of social or family expectations.

Just as we are drawn to another person, our sensitive voice is asking for our attention and guidance in need of healing, resolution, forgiveness, understanding, compassion, and unconditional love.

Speaking of which, we are experiencing an automatic reversal; it's part of us frozen in time. It shows our wounds do not heal, which created feelings of inadequacy or that something is wrong with us. Basically, it is improper madness.

When we are in a bad mood we try to ease ourselves with addictive behavior. It’s hard to relax because we think we need to do something to get better and express ourselves, so, not doing it, relaxing, is not safe.

When we are in trouble, it is difficult to be close to others. Deep down we think that something is wrong with us, so we do not go near them because they can find and leave. This keeps us real because we do not feel right about who we are.