Happiness Is A Verb

Some people look at happiness as a noun instead of a verb. They just wake up happy and they don't have to do any extra work. Well, if you're like me then you understand, that just doesn't work for us all the time.

This last year amid a world wide pandemic, riots, fights toward equality, and politics, I find myself waking up in the worst mood. When I try to explain to a friend who's had no coffee, yet, she's bouncing off the wall with excitement and energy at 6 am she loves to say "just be happy".

Happiness is not a noun, you cant just "be". Although, there are people out there who just have a natural positive and happy vibe about them, they're the ones like my above mentioned friend who doesn't need coffee and good news to smile before they even open their eyes in the morning, again, I am not one of those people.

So, below I've collected 10 different ways that I've used to condition myself to be more happy. For those of you who know Pavlov yes I did say condition. For those of you who've never heard of Pavlov he's a psychologist who used unconventional ways to trick the mind into responding a certain way.

"One believes things because one has been conditioned to believe them"

-Aldous Huxley

1.) Express Gratitude even about the small things.

If you're a pessimist you are going to see the bad side of every thing. If you're optimistic you'll see the bright side. Well the same works for gratitude. If you start off making sure to be grateful about the itty bitty things that seem insignificant then eventually it'll be normal for your brain to express gratitude all the time.

Also, be grateful towards yourself, if you accomplish something tell yourself thank you. If you achieve something great tell yourself good job. You're training yourself to automatically express gratitude to others as well.

“There is a calmness to a life lived in gratitude, a quiet joy.”

— Ralph H. Blum

2.) Surround yourself with positive people

Ever heard the saying birds of a feather flock together? Well, its mostly true. If you surround yourself around positive people they are forcing you to constantly look at things on the bright side. Which goes back into that lovely word of conditioning . Once your mind is conditioned eventually whether you're with those friends or not you will start to look on the bright side of things.

Conditioning is barely any different than forming a habit. You are teaching your brain that in all situations you will look on the bright side of things.

“It is the hopeful, buoyant, cheerful attitude of mind that wins. Optimism is a success builder; pessimism an achievement killer.”

– Orison Swett Marden

3.) Smile

Studies show that smiling even when you don't want to tricks the mind into being happy. It reduces your stress and lowers your heart rate. You can find the results of this study here. It's also shown that someone seeing your smile activates their brain into being happy and feeling rewarded.

Smile in the mirror every morning and you'll start to see a big difference in your life.

-Yoko Ono

4.) Get plenty of sleep

Sleep will prevent happiness every time. not only does it affect how you think but it will affect the way you feel as well. Not getting enough sleep is one of the key markers in people affected by mental health disorders such as depression and anxiety.

Also, lack of sleep leaves you moody, irritable, causes poor mental alertness, and effects your decision making.

5.) Exercise

Exercise has been known to decrease stress, ease anxiety, and release happy chemicals to your brain along with a burst of energy to your body.

If you don't like the gym or don't have the energy to work out, start off small. Start your day with a walk, 20 jumping jacks, or running in place. Anything to get your body moving and your heart pumping.

6.) Think happy thoughts

Always staying on the happy side of your thoughts will keep you a way from the doom and gloom. You can think happy thoughts while being realistic at the same time. Some people take the term into meaning that they expect nothing bad to happen and that everything will always go smoothly and that's just not the case.

Thinking happy thoughts comes with a lot of patience and acceptance. You understand that things may not go the way that you expect them to but you also see the brighter side of it.

For example if you have a job interview and you see that everyone else waiting is more educated on the position than you are, thinking happy thoughts would be understanding that you will still give it your best and if you don't get the position then at least you tried and you walked away knowing the things you should learn to get it next time.

Staying positive and happy keeps you pushing forward and out of the slump of feeling like things are just not working out for you.

7.) Forget about the past

This one is definitely easier said than done. If we forget about the shoulda, coulda, woulda's , and stay in the present, a lot of the self doubt and negativity would remain absent from our minds.

8.) Give yourself a break

Make sure you are being patient with your self and giving yourself a break. Not everyday will be a walk in the park. Accept that some days will be harder than others and that's okay.

Allow yourself the set back. We are not perfect beings nor will we move like well oiled machines. Sometimes we need a day to just relax and unwind for a bit.

This is the hardest thing for me to achieve currently. I am harder on myself than the world is on me. I give myself unrealistic goals and unreachable milestones everyday. It took a long time for me to realize that I was sabotaging myself and setting myself up for failure.

I had to start accepting my down days and doing better the next without wallowing in my failure to achieve things as planned.

9.) Change of environment

Going outside to get some fresh air and sun is beneficial to your mental health. For one, the sun itself provides your body with vitamin D which, when lacking, causes weak bones and depression.

A change in your environment will improve your mental health and lead to happiness. If you're in your home with the curtains drawn and the lights off, cuddled on your couch with a fluffy blanket, while watching Netflix; best believe your mood will be just as dark and gloomy.

Allowing in natural light and surrounding yourself with calming and cheerful colors is known to give your mood a boost.

You can go an extra step and surround yourself with calming fragrances such as lavender, bergamot, citrus, and more. Bath and Body Works has A wonderful aromatherapy line that increases mood and well being.

10.) Take all accomplishments as A win

Treat everything like an accomplishment. You rolled out of bed this morning without laying there for 20 minutes dreading your day? Great! That's an accomplishment. You decided to declutter your closet instead of binge watching your favorite show? Great, another accomplishment. You spilled coffee on your shirt and didn't make a big deal about it? Look at you staying positive! Every accomplishment no matter how big or small is a win.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Authors note: Thank you so much for reading through. Have a great day and dont forget to smile!

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