Fragmented Fairytale
In the mist of every dream, lies a very realistic reality.
Life always seemed like a fairy tale to me. As if one day I would wake up and be the "real me". I never truly saw the power I had in myself but some how I saw it in others. It was definitely normal for me to look at others with admiration and acknowledge the talents they possessed or even their physical beauty. Always wondering when and if that would ever be me. I always made excuses for why I wasn't as extraordinary as I viewed everyone else. I kept waiting for my life to start, in hopes that one day my super powers would just kick in. Not realizing that we all have incredible powers within us, just waiting to be activated by our experiences. Just because it may not be in plain sight and may even take sometime to discover, that doesn't mean one person is less capable than another. We all have an individual story that makes us beautiful.
Mine involved me being an overweight, quitter, over-thinker, under achiever, perfectionist, in search of validation from people to make me feel whole. I became a teenage mom at the age 19 after losing my own mother at 16. Being a young mother wasn't an uncommon situation for someone to go through in African American community but with no guidance; life forced me to figure things out on my own, which caused me to live in survival mode. So it took me a little longer to figure things out than it did for my peers but I learned on the way that that is okay. I am now putting my life together piece by piece and I changed my mind set. Instead of believing that I am doomed to a false reality, dealt a crappy hand or that there was just no hope for me. I decided to open my eyes and realize that I had options. Either I could sit on my butt, cry my eyes out and keep wishing that one day my life would change. Or, I could just try everyday, day by day to do something different. Change will never be easy you have to give your body and mind time to adjust. I was willing to try anything that would allow me to actually wake up feeling eager to start a new day and excited to start making strides towards the new life I wanted. With patience, determination, consistency and love for myself and life. It is more than likely I will one day get there. Even though I had patience and love for others for some reason I was much harder on myself. Not even giving myself a real chance. I spoke badly about myself, made uncomfortable jokes about my weight, took lousy jobs, stayed in unfulfilling relationships for years and never truly enjoyed life. I was stuck for years and I know for a fact, I am not the only one.
I'm sharing this because not only does writing make me feel liberated but because I have hopes that someone can relate. Or maybe I'll help another realize that even if they are not happy with their life in the present moment it's never too late to change the trajectory of their story. The past no longer exist and the future is to be determined, but it is based on your presents in the now. Figure out what you want and make a plan of action on what things you need to change in your day to day life to get you in alignment with your soul's desires. You have the power to create magical fairy tales in your mind but the actions you put behind them make those same stories come to life.
About the Creator
Mirrored Vessel
Here to find my tribe and share a little piece of my experiences.
So let's laugh, cry, heal and create together.
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A Mother's Life Goes Without Saying.
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