Comparing Apples to Athletes

I’m pretty sure I always will flinch to the sound of closing doors. And shiver to the touch of anybody I didn’t see behind me. Or even cower below someone’s mixed tone of voice. I am weak, I call it. But in reality, I am cautious. I check the backseat, the lock on the door, and my pockets 17 different times when I go to leave the house. It’s not OCD it’s anxiety. No, It’s my awareness. I look in every mirror when I leave the house to make sure I’m presentable to each and every one. Like judges on a runaway I ask permission to advance and some days they tell me “You made it'' and others it’s a brisk “Not today”. It’s not insecurity I swear, I am just prepared. Some days I leave the bed only to eat and tire myself out enough to get right back into it. People call it lazy days but I call it depression. But again it’s not, I am resting my body.

Compare me to the people of the internet who have the motivation to be physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially fit and I will come up short. So short my lanky 6-foot body would pale in comparison to the goliath that stands next to me. Shove me up against an athlete and I will always underperform. Put me in the same office as that 22-year-old millionaire and I will constantly fail to meet my numbers. Throw me next to the man who meditates for fun and reads inspirational quotes for breakfast and once again I will be inadequately equipped to say I am mentally stable. I eat cereal for breakfast, I am fighting just to have a job, and I ran 3 times this last week and felt like I was dying. I am not comparable to the standards. But that’s okay. I’ll just make my own.

If I run just one time this week and finish 2 miles I will have done better than I have done in 2 years. That’s a personal record broken. If I skip that late-night snack for a glass of water that’s not only a powerful self-control moment but a habit lost. There’s a change of heart. If I get a job and stick to it I’ll have worked harder than I have in weeks. Set your own goals, shatter them, and make more. If I just take one single step in the right direction I am moving mountains and when I realize that everything I do is at least trying I’ll maybe have learned something.

It’s not about the other people, it’s about yourself.