The Road to a Spiritual Awakening (so far)

When life throws you a curve ball you do not expect, how do you know what comes next? Truly, you don’t. I have found you can’t expect anything out of life, especially if you are putting negative energy into the universe. After a hard breakup with someone I truly loved, I kept the negative energy alive and negative things kept occurring. I had no idea why. I kept asking questions like, “why do bad things only happen to me?” or “why can’t anything go my way?”. With thoughts like those, it was true that nothing was going to go my way. Unless I believed it did.

Toward the end of 2020, I felt lost. I did not have a job after graduating with my Master’s degree, my partner broke up with me, I moved back home into a toxic environment, and due to my depression and anxiety making another appearance, I started to push away some of my biggest support systems. A friend, who has always believed in spiritual items such as tarot, recommended me to a spiritual coach who can help guide me and help me find my path. I met my spiritual coach in October 2020. I had no interest or experience with spirituality, so everything was completely out of my comfort zone. Little did I know that this was going to begin the road to my spiritual awakening.

I have always turned to science to explain any type of phenomenon. Which led to me having very little belief in many things, such as a higher power, unless there was a scientific explanation for it. Although growing up in a strict Catholic household, I never fully believed in a higher power. I didn’t believe fully in a higher power, because I did not have the best childhood growing up. I went through a lot of my life with having no support and never understood how all these “bad things” could happen no matter how hard I behave and follow the rules. Well, at the time, I didn’t know that wasn’t true. I just didn’t know that spirit guides existed for many individuals. I also didn’t realize that all of these “bad things” were all meant to happen. We all know that phrase “everything happens for a reason” and for a while I just looked toward what the reasoning was and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t find my answer. Then I learned about divine timing. All these things that occurred for a reason, happened at the time they were meant to. My spiritual coach taught me to be patient with the universe, because things I wanted to happen were not happening when I wanted them to. Sometimes, the universe is telling you to take a step back, because it will happen when it is meant to. After many failed job interviews, I was losing hope. I just didn’t realize that the universe was bringing me the job that I am currently in. I didn’t realize that the right job with the right people was out there for me. This helped me learn that my spirit guides were truly looking out for me.

During my road to my spiritual awakening, I started seeing signs. These signs can come in many different forms whether you ask the universe for something specific or a synchronicity in your life. The universe also communicates with you through numbers. Yes, numbers. My guides were constantly communicating with me through “Angel Numbers”. Angel numbers come in forms such as 111, 1111, 222, 1234, etc. and each number has a different meaning. At first, I had no idea what they meant and I do remember the first time I started noticing them. I went shopping with my sister-in-law to pick up stuff for my niece. Her total came to about $222. Once you start noticing, you can’t stop. After that moment I started seeing angel numbers everywhere, on license plates, receipts, the time, and I didn’t know what my guides were trying to tell me. Honestly, I still don’t know sometimes. This is something I am still on the road to learn more about. Right before I sat down to write this, I randomly looked at my clock on my computer and it happened to be 11:11. This is how I know my guides are with me and I am on the right path. When I first started seeing these numbers, I didn’t know I was beginning to go through a spiritual awakening.

Along with seeing angel numbers I began to experience synchronicities. I noticed that I would think about something and then later it would occur in real life. For example, my sister was coming to visit and I thought about texting her to tell her to bring her cat, Kiba, because I love being able to spend time with her pet. I ended up not texting her, but later I get a call from my dad saying that my sister will be coming over in the afternoon and she is bringing Kiba with her. I thought it as just a coincidence, but turns out it was my guides communicating with me through this synchronicity. Another time I thought about getting this one restaurants takeout for lunch or dinner and ultimately just decided to save my money and make food at home. Later I get a call from my dad as he’s on his way home from work and he tells me he’s too tired to cook and suggests we get that specific restaurant for dinner. I really thanked my spirit guides for that synchronicity. For a while, I thought these were just coincidentally happening, little did I know they were signs from the universe that I am on the right path.

When I explained my experiences with my spiritual coach, that is when I learned I am going through a spiritual awakening. She shared that all these things are happening because I am on the right path, but I had no idea how they were signs. How can I tell what I am doing differently? I learned to look more at my thoughts. I noticed my thoughts started to become more positive and I was putting less negative energy in the universe. It felt like the universe was rewarding me for putting more positive energy into the universe. I finally began to understand that things can go my way, as long as I believe it. I want good things to happen, so I need to send positive energy into the universe. You know what began? GOOD THINGS! I landed my job, I started to notice how much happier I’ve become, I started crying a lot less (I genuinely used to cry daily). My friendships started to flourish, and I started to have positive relationships with some of my biggest support systems. I decided to continue with my spiritual awakening and take on this spiritual journey.

I am still learning about spirituality and my spirit guides. There are so many different aspects to spirituality and cleansing your life/spaces of negative energy. I began to look into crystals and ways to cleanse my new areas to stray away from negative energy. While I still have a long way to go, I now know how to navigate my spiritual awakening and that my spirit guides are always with me, protecting me. I can’t wait to see what life holds for me, but that will all happen in divine timing.