The Adventure of Middle Adulthood

In the movie Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert is a middle-aged woman on a quest to find meaning in her life. Even though everything in her life seems to add up, she still feels empty and yearns for something more. She wondered what more she needed to do to find satisfaction and purpose? Elizabeth, usually called Liz, demonstrated many concepts and behaviors that are common among middle adults. I wish to focus on midlife crisis, the empty nest syndrome, and friendship.

Studies have shown that a midlife crisis is the minority, not the majority. In fact, a midlife crisis only occurs in about 10% of middle adult’s lives. At the University of Zurich, in Switzerland, a study was done that showed that middle adulthood is primarily seen as a positive time of life and full of new possibilities. Well then, what is a midlife crisis? According to George Valliant, a psychiatrist who spent most of his career researching adult development, it is a “time when one reassesses the truth about adolescence and adulthood.” In the movie, Liz falls out of love, gets a divorce, and experiences a midlife crisis as she searches for her true identity. Often times a midlife crisis is characterized by a search of an undefined dream or goal and can lead to making changes. Some adults experiencing this make large purchases while others decide to renovate their kitchen and call the hardwood floor renewal westminister to give things a new look. Other times adults decide to travel the world in hopes to discover who they really are which is exactly what Liz does. Following her divorce, she meets another guy, which also ends up not working out. It is then that she decides that she is going to travel the world. She first moves to Italy for a few months, followed by India, and then Indonesia.

According to an article released by the Mayo Clinic in April 2020, the empty nest syndrome is a feeling of grief and loneliness parents may feel when their children leave home for the first time. It also includes a decline in marital satisfaction among the parents. This, however, is rare, and most couples report marital satisfaction increasing, not decreasing, after the children leave the home. The empty nest syndrome is demonstrated in the movie when Felipe, the man that Liz ends up falling in love with, has a very hard time letting his 19-year-old son leave. He gives him a big, long hug, and is emotional as his son departs.

Just as friendship is important for children and adolescence, it is equally important for adults to develop friendships. That being said, friendships that are formed during the adult years usually are not as deep as those that are formed and endured from an earlier age. Ben Rector, an artist singing about friends, wrote “You can grow up, make new ones, but the truth is there’s nothing like old friends. Cause you can’t make old friends.” I saw this to be true in the life of Liz. She didn’t have any lifelong friends, at least not that the movie showed, but she did make friends along the way in her travels who were important to her development, success, and happiness. They helped her learn things about herself and they helped her to grow but, because these friendships were formed in her middle adulthood, they were more temporary and not as lasting.

For some, like Elizabeth Gilbert, middle adulthood can be a time of crisis that leads to soul searching. For some, it can be a time of despair when children leave the home. But this should not bring fear. For most people, middle adulthood is a time of joy and satisfaction.