Stop Telling Me To Calm Down

Dear Every Single Person That Has Told Me To Relax, Calm Down, And That It Is Not That Bad,

First and foremost, I’d like to say the following:

Fuck You.

Secondly, I am immunocompromised. I have an auto-immune disorder. I shouldn't need to disclose that information to you for my concern over COVID-19 to be taken seriously.

I understand that washing my hands is important, I do it, frequently. Welcome to my life with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. I washed my hands too frequently for much of my life. I understand that hand sanitizer is not as effective, but it's better than nothing and I can't carry around a fucking sink in my purse. I know the precautions I need to take as a person and trust the things that are within my control, I am doing.

What I can not control, is nasty people who cough into the open air like some 14th-century peasant who thinks that being sick is caused by ill humors. What is outside of my control is the guy behind me in the elevator breathing into my fucking hair. What is fucking beyond my ability to avoid is the person handing me a coffee being forced to come work while infectious because either they have just caught it, and are still asymptomatic, or because they serve a capitalist fucking system that doesn't give a shit about them and pays them minimum wage with no insurance.

It is unclear if the COVID-19 tests are effective after the first 72 hours of showing symptoms. It is unclear how many days you can remain asymptomatic, while being infectious, without ever knowing you are sick. It is unclear because all I have are a bunch of drafts sent out from Chinese doctors that some fucking hero ran through google translate and posted to a forum on the deep web, because the CDC is so underfunded, it has been rendered completely ineffective.

And here is another thing to ponder my dear friends who keep telling me to calm the fuck down. What about the houseless population. Little to no access to clean water. Little to no access to clean clothes, proper nutrition or hygiene. And consistently turned away from medical institutions for being houseless. No one treats them, they die. They get swept up in heartless attacks on dignity, and the city won't pay for an autopsy because what do they care about how the untouchable died? How many handrails, elevator buttons, door handles, and parking meters did that individual touch? Who knows because no one looks at them.

When healthcare is privatized our health is only as safe as the most vulnerable among us, and I tell you we are screwed.

The numbers reported aren't right nor will they be, as the tests were unavailable and denied, and now that they are allowing people to get tested, they have to trek to three locations in the city, to be tested in parking garages in tents. And they can only be tested with a doctor's referral.

So yes I will overreact, and overthink because that is what I can do. Overreacting helps to keep me, and my friends who are also at risk of dying safe. My caution keeps your granny alive during an outbreak. Some of you need to watch Contagion again or read some first-hand accounts of what it feels like to have SARS because your complete lack of concern for the well being of this country's most vulnerable is showing.

I also highly recommend that you read about what the Chinese government did to hide SARS and the severity of it from the WHO, and ask yourself if you see similar behavior from the US government because I sure as shit do.

Signed - A Person Who Doesn't Want To Fucking Die