Learning to breathe:

Scales are my nemesis. Not because I truly struggle with weight, thanks for birdlike genetics on my mother’s side, but because generally speaking, as I approach my mid-40’s my weight has decided to settle comfortably in a “healthy” zone, and just hang out. I used to monitor the numbers with an eagle eye, frantically trying to evaluate the impact of dietary changes, workouts, etc.. to no avail. The only adjustment was upward, as I inevitably fell victim to the Corona relapse. But even that was lackadaisical, as if the even effort of gaining weight seemed like too much work.

However, I LOVE exercise. From my younger days of hiking, swimming and solo dance parties, to my epiphany of hot yoga, the joy of challenging myself, and the sweet rush of endorphins which followed provided physical as well as mental catharsis. USUALLY. Even if the scale continued to taunt me, I loved the feeling of completion, the thrill of giving into the beat, the triumphant beep of the final countdown on my elliptical, you get the idea.

Working out in the time of Corona has presented a unique challenge. Living in Scottsdale Arizona, with 110 degree heat, and closed gyms means if I want to feel the burn, it is up to me. The internet and Google play provide a plethora of options. Trial and error ensue. At least Roku gifts me with my first glimmer of hope. Enter the Gymbox. Gymbox, on Roku, is a free collection of workout videos from Power Cardio to Yoga, Kickboxing to my personal favorite…Cardio Dance.

The first time I tried Cardio Dance, I laughed so hard at my efforts that I sat down and had to begin again. As much as I love to dance, trying to follow a fixed routine is not my forte. Grapevine-what? Pas de bourrée? Yeah right. Belly Roll with snake arms? No comment. Suffice it to say, Kaycee made it look easy, but I looked like someone suffering from a seizure. And yet…. For some reason I kept coming back for more, and I have grown to love it. Now I alternate my Cardio dance with Kickboxing and Power Cardio. I feel freer and stronger and sillier than I have in years. I thank the Lord I will never have to do this in the presence of others or within eye line of a mirror, but it has been a wonderful boon to my soul.

Round 2

When I was younger, I took great pride in my ab workout. With a little help from Metallica’s One, I had my 1000 sit-up routine down, and I wore crop-tops as if they would never go out of style. Three kids later, my abs had a vague memory of what a 6 pack looked like, but I feared the mythical middle age paunch was my inevitable destiny. Occasionally I would throw out a few reps at the gym, trying to reawaken the dormant muscle memory, but I was far less driven than my Metallica days. Welcome to the 30 day challenge. Thanks for Google Play, accountability has now become my enemy and my friend. Day after wonderfully torturous day, sweating through cobras, bridges, reverse crunches galore, I have fought my way back to definition. As I pray my way through my planks, I feel my breath coming easier, and as I complete my final reps, the glow I feel is not merely the sweat I will need to wash away before the real work of the day begins, but the thrill of knowing that I am one day closer to fine.