If You Hate Your Life — Do This Right Now!

Have you ever felt like you just hated every aspect of your life? That’s okay.

Before you read any further, I would like to say — Please pause when you feel, I hate my life, What do I do?

Loneliness isn’t anyone’s fault, but it can be hard to fix on your own. There is always someone ready to listen.

How to deal with feeling like you hate your life.

Life is full of peaks and valleys; you’ll have a lot of good times but also a lot of bad times. When you’re going through the wrong time, it’s easy to get depressed and feel like you hate your life.

But you don’t have to let the bad times get you down.

This is the most important lesson I’ve ever learned. Do things. You can’t sit on the sidelines and wish for a better future: these things will happen, even when you’re sad.

But most of the time, it doesn’t work that way. While the world continues to exist, there were so many days in my life that it felt my world had stopped.

I’m not going to lie: I have been living this way for a long time. And it took my MOM’s passing to see that life isn’t supposed to be easy. As she breathed her last, she gave me a life lesson to move forward after she is gone. But even that said, and while on most days I recognize that there is enough beauty in life to keep me going until the very end, I still cry on most days.

MOM died teaching me, that love is there all is. All she left us were her loving words, and the very last words as she took her last breath were, I love you.

Phrases that make people stop in their tracks and make them want to “just get on with it” are the easiest to say and the hardest to remember.

My grief doesn’t end. And I have accepted the fact that it will not end. And I am finding out that MOM is still around me, around us, her family.

My relationship with her continues even in the afterlife. It is true what they say, a loved one who is gone becomes your guardian angel you can call by their name.

Things that make us happy can shift.

I try my best to find things that can make me happy, if not happy, at least to smile about.

Life isn’t always good and if you’re not enjoying your life, change something.

I used to think that I wanted to live the correct way to live: if I wanted to go running, I would go running. If I wanted to travel, I would travel. If I wanted to eat chocolate, I would eat chocolate. If I wanted to drink coffee, I would drink coffee in a coffee shop near me. If I wanted to have friends, I would have friends.

But this is not what life is about, and I’m delighted I started listening to myself.

Why you might feel lonely even if you’re not alone.

It’s easy to feel lonely when you live in a big city, even if people surround you. Even if you have many friends, it’s easy to feel alone if you don’t have a partner or have a best friend to talk to about your problems.

Loneliness is a feeling of emotional and mental withdrawal caused by the fear of losing or being left behind.

It’s caused by the fact that you can’t fulfill basic human needs, like social connection, without being attached to someone else and that you’re experiencing a steady decline in these critical aspects of your life. That said, it’s also easy to take loneliness for granted when you haven’t lived it.

It doesn’t give you a perfect frame of reference, so you don’t recognize how bad it is.

There’s no natural way to compare the pain of loneliness to other areas of your life. How you can get ahead of the curve to get through to that very corner of loneliness that’s currently keeping you awake at night could be paralyzing a moment. I have dreaded the feeling in the past.

Why it can be hard to make new friends.

Making friends gets harder as we get older.

Recently, I have cut ties with people who were friends. Because if there is one life lesson I can pass on to you is always to choose yourself. And while I wish them the best in life, my life continues from hereon without them.

It took me a long time that I have realized that they were gaslighting me.

It’s natural to have fewer friends as you get older, but it’s not a bad thing. As we get older, our priorities shift from our friends to our family. It’s still important to have your friends.

The principle still applies: surround yourself with people who bring joy into your life and bring more meaning to your days.

If I have too many functional friends who don’t challenge me, I won’t grow as a person. If I have too many friends who don’t challenge me in a way that would stir me, then again, I will not grow as a person. I won’t be able to do everything I can to help them when I am needed.

The people around you keep you feel connected and motivated to want to continue being around them. Your relationships are vital to your growth.

As you enter your 20s, you can afford to free fall a little bit. Let leniency and a little creativity guide your decisions, and trust that people will come around in due course.

And that while life seems to get busier during your 20s, it’s crucial to nurture your relationships. It’s harder to determine when it’s okay to hang out with someone again and when it’s not.

Your 20s are pretty incredible. Enjoy it! Just don’t let anybody tell you that your 20s are worthless and try to force your way out of them.

Take time to savor these beautiful years and relax as much as possible.

How to find the motivation to do anything when you hate your life.

Sometimes you have to force yourself to do things that you hate to find new things that you love.

You have to keep trying new things to find the things you love.

If you don’t love what you do, you need to find a way to be kind to yourself and let it go, the same with people you stopped loving.

A productivity app called Notion recently had a reminder appear on my phone that I’d been using my goal tracker since 2016 to share little nuggets of motivation.

A random white square popped up. It’d been showing up since I started my first project. I knew that I’d wanted to share it every month, and I’d done so before to help me stay motivated.

The question is this: Has it felt like anything meaningful has come from your goals over the past year?

I’ve never really measured that before. I’m usually just more interested in the expected results of my actions instead. But, if you want to gauge whether you’re accomplishing your goals, you can.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. Whatever small goal you felt you have ticked on your checklist, that’s a small win on top of a massive list of goals to accomplish.

But there’s a broken glass jar on the top of my checklist that I only managed to fill half of this year. And for now, I will keep it in my chest until I am ready to share it with the world.

And I choose to be kind to myself.

Frankly, if you don’t set goals, it’s not like you can’t mirror what’s going on in life around you. The occasional happy accident does happen. But if you never take action, nothing ever changes, so how do you make a plan and make progress? You’ve just got to get out of your comfort zone for one day.

Losing myself in a new place is an excellent way to push yourself to the limits of whatever you’re currently doing.

How to deal with loneliness and social anxiety.

Social anxiety is the fear of interacting with other people. It makes it hard to meet people or talk to strangers. Social anxiety can cause a lot of loneliness and prevent you from getting out of your comfort zone and meeting new people.

You may feel stuck in the place known as ‘loneliness’ for some time.

Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be this way. If you are constantly avoiding social interaction, it is usually a result of being shy.

Social anxiety is the result of your own internalized dislike for social interactions — and if you have your inner critic telling you that there could be something wrong with you, do stop that voice and pause.

Psychological approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy or talk therapy offer a way for shy people to change their behavior. Talk therapy aims to improve your attitude towards social interactions.

By first noticing how you interact with people in changing circumstances, talk therapy eventually will lead you to be more comfortable and desirable in social situations. Text therapy can be used when people interact in person, such as in a business casual office environment. You might talk with someone, tell them a joke, and end up leaving a space on the other end.

Text therapy aims to change how you see the interaction, in general, to be more willing to participate in modeling healthy interaction. Social awkwardness is the feeling you get from being uncomfortable with social situations.

You may feel awkward talking to strangers and keep it a secret from everyone except your close friends. You may feel awful about yourself and think that you don’t belong in a social setting.

I can only see life with my own lens. And I am still a work in progress. There are areas in my that I want to change.

After MOM died, I have been asking more from life,

Ask, and you shall receive. — Matthew 7:7–8

Life isn’t supposed to be easy. We are here not only to experience life but learn from what life teaches us.

And during the times when you tell yourself, I hate my life what do I do,

Pause and breathe. All it takes is a second to give life another chance, as life gives you another chance at life.