Fresh Start

Out With The Old, In With The New

At this point of my life, I think I've earned the title of "Fresh Start Queen." Specifically speaking to leaving the old in the past and ushering in what's next! I became aware of this process in 2018 but it began way before then. Before I get into it, you should know that I'm attempting a one-in-a-lifetime career as an Actor, Producer and Writer. I moved to Hollywood, La-La Land three years and ten months ago. Man, my 4 year anniversary is around the corner and time has flown by! I've had around 7 different housing arrangements within these past 3 years and let me be the one to tell you that, you have no choice but to keep it moving!

2021

At first I was apprehensive about 2021 bringing us any real relief given what 2020 brought us, nevertheless, I made a vow to myself to stay motivated and focused for 2021. 2020 was about perfect vision, so I dubbed 2021: Focus. Focus on that vision, can you dig it? I would like to think of myself as a Scientist, so my choices are on the petri dish and I'm looking at them through a microscope. What a fitting analogy for a pandemic world. My first step was cleansing my energy. If you think of the word cleansing it implies that something was first muddied or unclean. What does this look like to me? People who add no value to my life and on the adverse, drain me of my energy. Those people have repeatedly had to "go" in every fresh start of my life. I recognized this need by the amount of years of my life spent making that pedigree of people my priority, only to realize that I was living for everyone else but myself. Time passes you by but you haven't noticed until the numbers of your birthday start adding up. In came 2021 with the same sweeping effects. I said goodbye to 2 people who shared a lot of my space on an intimate level last year because in the end, I was more supportive of them than they ever were of me. Within the first 2 weeks of January, the cleansing continued. The next pair seemed harder to let go of because both these individuals had tried to convince me that my life would be better off with them in it. I had to make the decision that my goals meant more to me than the time and energy they took away from me reaching them. There is always a cost to pay in exchange for something else, so, choose wisely.

Spiritual Journey

I started on a spiritual journey in November 2020 where I set the intention to "dig deep and find my roots." Be careful what you wish for because you have to be ready for the uncovering and what that really manifests as. I've referred to myself as "lost in the right direction," in past articles and I always know what I need and where to go looking, when I need it. I don't plan for it, I just feel the need and fulfill it. I guess that makes me impulsive and intuitive, so now, I'm making a diligent effort to be more intentional with everything I do. For instance, my bank account has never seen this many zeros ever since the last week of December 2020 till today and I don't mean the zeros that follow each other. If I prioritize being and remaining financially prepared, I would not spend as frivolously as I do. Abundance requires having something in your bank account, doesn't it?

Daily Routines

Apart of my spiritual journey are mantra's, affirmations and setting meaningful intentions each day. I've also decided that movement, meditation and meals matter every day. It's hard to stick to cooked food and a healthy diet with no money but I try, I'm not a quitter. Even more important is my mental health. I've been on a more positive mental space since about August 2020 when I decided to do what I could with what I had and even with what I didn't have. Told you, I'm the Queen of Fresh Starts. I'm sort of a magician. I end every day with gratitude because I may not have any money, but, somehow I still have a roof over my head and my spirits are up! I'm like on cruise control, really... Right before the car runs out of gas, but the gas station is within sight. How can I give up? Plus, I bought 2 rings from Mantraband that is inscribed with the message, "Never Give Up" and "You Got This." I'm now a Brand Ambassador for Mantraband jewelry as pictured in this article's main picture. Below is my link to shop with a special discount for you. (I went a little crazy and bought 3 bracelets as well and used Affirm payment system: buy now, pay later) Use the code SELFLOVEBEFORESHAREDLOVE at check out for 10% off, you're welcome. I sleep with my Mantraband jewelry. I went from wearing no jewelry for about 3 years to wearing it around the clock. I love how hot my rings get on my finger at night, makes me feel the energy of the mantra at work on my skin.

Try Something New

To keep the momentum up I decided to try something new, a tangible, something new- podcasting. I've been practicing and it's been going well! See my article "Hello Clubhouse" to find out more about podcasting. One thing that I like to do each year is by a couple of new books to read, or, I should say to add to my library of unread books. This year I've bought 7 new books already, 1 audible and another pdf. I also sort of made a new years resolution to read one book every month. Then I listened to a podcast which said that if you can't get through a book, it may the book. I'm still sorting it out, "WIP." (work in progress) I now have 5 books from Ph. D's surrounding mental health and spirituality. I think I might need a retreat to actually unplug and just read for hours on end each day. I'm also hoping to finish up my Life Coaching course by March 30th or April 20th. I know, very specific, I told you, I have to be intentional now. There is no other way to manifest. All blurred lines need to become straight lines.

There's a New Administration in town and it seems too good to be true!

The # 1 reason for a Fresh Start happened 6 days ago at the Inauguration of Joe Biden as the 46th President of the USA and Kamala Harris as the first Black and South Asian, female Vice President of the USA. I sure can breath better now. It just feels so much better to know that Mom and Pops are in the White House. (They seriously remind me of my Mom and Step Dad) On a local level, covid restrictions and our 10pm curfew have lifted this week, sort of as I sit here typing. Effective on Friday, we can dine outdoors again and get our nails and hair done! This time, I'm actually ready to get back to work! I did a very short stint at an Amazon distribution center last April in the thick of it. Everyone was getting covid and new cases were being revealed daily, so, I quit. I also haven't been able to gain unemployment insurance because it's hard to as an Actor with an inconsistent schedule and a host of production companies as my Employers. I also didn't try hard enough but I'm hoping to change that right now and with this new administration. Speaking of hair salons reopening, due to the zero's in my bank account, I'm gonna go ahead and DIY my fresh, new haircut! It's been a while since I've cut my own hair, looking forward to it.

Fresh January Start

It’s like moving to LA all over again but this time I’m mentally prepared! I've lasted this long without paying attention to self-care and my bank account. I still don't have a car and it's been 4 years. Taking the bus has its perks, mostly it reminds me to be cognizant of the human experience. LA has its fill of a homeless population, if anything it's a reminder that there's work to do and also that I'm always one stop away from homelessness myself. Yet, still, I love the idea of sacrificing to focus on the bigger picture. I will do without a car to afford the bare minimum of what will keep me going to just another audition... I'm a newbie member of Screen Actors Guild now too, a $3111 investment into my Acting career, no wonder I'm broke! A goal that I have aspired to for the past 2 years has finally arrived. The little, seemingly impossible victories keep my head in the game. The sacrifices to achieve a career of a lifetime are innumerable. The one good thing about rock bottom is, the only way to go is up! Today’s page quote from my notebook totally lined up with this article, Robert Frost- “The Best Way Out Is Always Through.”