Dreaming = Exhausting

I am so tired. I don't know what it is. I sleep so much, but it feels like it is never enough. I must be getting between seven and nine hours a night at least, which is more than enough. Those around me see that I sleep a lot and think I am being lazy, but I'm really not. I can't help it. All I want to do is sleep. I honestly could sleep forever.

I have really vivid dreams all night long too. Maybe that is why I am so exhausted every day. I do so much in my dreams that it tires me out for the whole day. It sounds silly, but I'm not making it up. My dreams are full of different adventures, but I don't always remember them when I wake.

Some people have said that eating certain foods, like cheese, before you sleep cause nightmares or vivid dreams. It might be this, but I don't always have cheese before bed. I've been on a new medication recently which is said to make you more tired. I've been having these dreams for months, though. It can't be the medicine.

Some of my dreams feel so real that I can't differentiate between my dream world and reality any more. It is so scary to think that something that happens in real life I believe is actually a dream. I have had dreams that have caused me to wake up crying because it was so distressing. I have had dreams that I have ended up acting out in real life while I am sleeping.

I'm being serious. I once had a nightmare, where I reached out to hit someone. In real life I reached out and hit the wall, which caused me to break two nails and bruise my hand a little. That terrified me, because what if it happens again? What if something worse happens next time? I could end up sleep walking or something. I've never done that before, but anything is possible. When I was younger, my mum said I used to sit straight up and mumble some words then lie down again. I don't think I've done that in a long time, but stress and anxiety can make you do weird things.

Sometimes I wake up in pain, everywhere. My jaw aches more than anything, because I think I clench it while I sleep. I try so hard not to, but I can't control it when I'm sleeping. My neck hurts too and my joints. I don't know why. It can't be my pillows or mattress because I only just got those. There has to be something else. I find myself constantly tossing and turning, trying to find a comfortable position. I'll wake up after a few hours to turn over and face the other way, so I don't sleep all the way through. My sleep is always broken.

I don't know how to make it stop. I would love to have a dreamless sleep, just for one night, a sleep where I don't wake up aching. Just so I can wake up feeling refreshed and ready for the day. Is that really so much to ask? I don't think it is. I hate being so tired all the time. It makes me not want to do anything, but I have to get up every day and go to work. Work is so boring at the moment too, so it makes me want to sleep even more. I feel like I'm the only person who is exhausted from sleeping. How is that possible? It doesn't make sense! None of this makes sense!