A Pretty Woman's Practical Guide

From the time I was a little girl, having the ability to comprehend upwards to the age of 40 odd, I have been and still am called a pretty girl. Just the other day, while leaving the grocery store with my bags in hand someone that I did not know yelled from across the parking lot “Hey pretty girl, need some help?” While some persons may not say anything complimentary, there are still stares and looks to contend with. I have also gotten the impression that I am sized up on occasion which may or may not be followed up by questions about my nationality, my hair (and whether it is “real”) and/or even my age. It is simply amazing at times that persons become so enthralled by the outside that certain personal questions regarding my physical appearance roll off their tongues before they, apparently, have a chance to think twice about them. This can be awkward to say the least. Frequently and effortlessly becoming the focus of someone’s attention in a moment is something I have become accustomed to my entire life. Many may think that I am being conceited by openly confessing that I have always been called a “pretty girl.” However, there are compelling positive reasons I have chosen to share what I have learned in my journey as a self-proclaimed “pretty girl.” Personally, I have always felt like the old cliché that “beauty is skin deep” are words worth living by. I have prided myself on trying to develop a good heart as I have matured from a pretty girl into what I would refer to as a full blown pretty woman. I would like to provide some practical tips to assist other pretty women on how to stay down to earth.

A pretty woman’s guide to staying down to earth:

1. Always remember that beauty is transitory and, in time, matures into what, in the eyes of the contemporary world, may go totally unnoticed by all but a few.

2. There will always be someone prettier than you. Yes, I know that, by the time you put yourself together in the mirror, you are stunning, but the cold hard truth is that you are not the prettiest on the planet and will not ever be. This is especially true because beauty is relative and subjective.

3. There will always be other women who accentuate themselves better than you do based on their unique selection of makeup, shoes, clothing, accessories etc. It is not about competing with other women and we need to learn how to celebrate each other more, especially when we meet others who are well put together. Hopefully, we can learn from each other on how to improve our own personal presentation.

4. Never (never is a strong word), never use your gift of prettiness to manipulate others to get what you want or think that you are entitled to. This almost always comes back to haunt you in ways you least expect it and could create mild to severe problems in your relationships. No one wants to find out that they are being taken advantage of.

5. Try to make women comfortable who display signs of uneasiness or insecurities just from being around you. This can be done by genuinely finding at least one thing you can compliment them on, even if it is one part of their outfit, hair, makeup etc. If you still sense the uneasiness or some insecurities because individuals are not receptive to you, it is still okay. You tried.

6. With all of that prettiness you have been gifted with, why hide it behind excessive contouring, foundation etc.? These days you can easily put on two or more layers of makeup before you feel as if you are adequately prepared to step into the public. Be more accepting of yourself, embrace and nurture the natural side of you.

7. Prettiness is really a state of mind. There are days that may go by that you may not get a compliment and because you were so accustomed to hearing it you may feel “unpretty” and begin to second guess things such as the way your hair was fixed or the outfits you chose. Be confident that you are still pretty, even if no one has affirmed you.

8. Stay humble. Always keep your feet firmly planted and keep your head out of the clouds because prettiness can change in an instant due to an unfortunate freak accident, sickness etc.

9. If you are privileged to draw persons to you because you are pretty, use it in a positive and meaningful way by selecting a platform or a cause that you can speak with others about in order to make a difference in your own sphere of influence.

10. Learn how to not to hurt the feelings of persons who may appear uncontrollably and naturally attracted to you. Let’s face it, some individuals are simply intimidated to speak with you and if they are able to muster up the strength to blurt out a few words with a view asking you out, please do not annihilate them. Rather, learn the art of tactfully and gracefully declining in a way that you are firm but not rude.

It is not as easy as people think being categorized as pretty, on the other hand, we do not get to choose how we would look when we were born. Learning to celebrate your gift of prettiness comes with embracing the beauty of you as an individual on a holistic basis. External beauty means absolutely nothing if you have an unattractive heart and arrogant mannerisms. The beauty of a woman should radiate from her aura more than from her face and body as this is the true essence of beauty for a woman.