Art & Fear
A problematic favorite.
We live in such influential times, we are often molded by what we witness on a day to day basis. With modern technology, there's definitely a sensory overload that I know I experience. The world is becoming so overpopulated as well, everybody's doing everything and anything. You can be a witness from thousands of miles away by a simple click of a button. It's undeniable that the options of self-expression are damn near infinite. I think that's mainly why we scrutinize our snap and Insta stories more often than the people who actually look at them. Perhaps sometimes, we become too sensitive to our own flaws. And maybe we can thank filters for that. Painting a view through rose-colored lenses for people to see us.
As someone who wants to be influential through their own self-expression, it's so easy to get lost in translation. It takes a lot of courage and stamina to make a difference through self-expression. Not to mention tremendous amounts of hard work on top of it.
As an artist, there are so many ways you can fail. And of course, many people do. Failure can be your friend, and so can the fear. The fear of failure is often what keeps people from pursuing their dreams and passions; it's sad but it's so true. Most failures are lessons and failure is an essential part of life. How can the human race evolve without any mistakes being made? How can anybody learn anything without completely screwing everything up?
Fear of being ignored, fear of looking like a fool, fear of actually BEING a fool without even knowing it, fear of judgment (that's a huge one). Through self-expression will definitely come judgment. That is UNDENIABLE. It's gonna be a huge leap of faith. And yes, you might fall straight to rock bottom, but not to your death. You've got to brush your shoulders off and begin the climb again. The rising action is what makes it exciting. Be judged, but never wear those judgments. They will weigh you down.
I've been so excited to share my art with the world and to have the support of my friends that when I do encounter any haters, or as I like to call them, "anti-fans," I'm not gonna lie, it really hurts me. I've had people I thought were my friends anonymously hate on my brand, on my art. I've had vendors invite me to festivals, just to be humiliated by the consumers who attended. I've drunkenly made a fool out of myself and have woken up the next morning thinking, "Oh god, there goes my reputation."
These fears, that I know we all share, have kept me from putting that brush to a canvas, that pen to a paper. It's kept me from being happy, it's made me paranoid, it's broken my own heart. But you know what has hurt me more? NOT doing the things I actually love. It's gotta be for you and only you. And if you're brave enough and want to share it with the rest of the world, you're already doing an excellent thing.
What I'm honestly trying to say here, is that with self-expression, with art...yes, be careful...but you can't afford to be afraid during times like these. Express yourself and never be afraid of being overlooked or scrutinized. Chances are, you're probably looking too hard in that proverbial mirror, or just sleeping on yourself. Never sleep on yourself, but always get a good nights rest. It's a fine line you have to walk, maybe even more of a tightrope. We're all guilty of starting things we can not finish. But if you're really passionate about something you must not hold yourself back, ever.