The Subtle Art of the Dad Joke

Long ago, when the first cavedad hit his cavehead on the cave overhang and dropped a stone on his cavefoot, his caveson cavelaughed.

Then, he added the caveat: "It's inappropriate to make a 'dad joke' if you're not a dad. It's a faux pa."

Thus, humor was born.

True story probably.

A few years later, in the 1980's and 90's ("and today..." 🎶🎙😎), humor took a weird, twisted turn to something kind of angry and bitter.

Suddenly, it was all the rage to use humor to poke fun at and diminish others, rather than to actually be humorous by oneself.

Mercifully, the dark times have ended.

At least, the dark times where that sort of humor was kind of the only option available have ended.

Sidenote: Laughter and slaughter are separated by just that one letter. Does that make anyone else mildly uncomfortable?

The Age of the Dad Joke

Over the past few years, I have come to recognize that my preferred brand of humor is Dad Joke'ian, at least in structure. This surprised me, as I also know how eye-rolly they can be.

But stick with me a sec, you may be surprised at the benevolent ingredients involved in this cheesecake. 👨🏻‍🍳

Here's why good Dad Jokes are the best modern day humor has to offer:

• They're thoughtful. The typical DJ (😎) is somewhat insightful in nature, requiring a slightly-deeper-than-usual look at life in order to alchemize.

Example: How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten.

Ten tickles.

• They often point out some rather odd and arbitrary elements of our culture. Elements (such as language) which we usually take-for-granted and do not question.

Example 1: Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot.

Example 2: This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in.

• Good DJs are harmless by nature. Literally. Even when they are 'poking fun' at something, it's light and sometimes even complimentary in a way.

Example 1: If you see a crime at an Apple Store, does that make you an iWitness?

Example 2: I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.

I'll let you know...

• There's something about a solid Dad Joke that can lighten even the most serious melodramatic moment one may be experiencing.

Example 1: Did you know corduroy pillows are in style?

Yeah, they're making headlines.

Example 2: How do you follow Will Smith in the snow?

You follow the fresh prints.

Example 3: What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"Supplies!"

• They're short! No need to stick around for some over-developed punchline that doesn't pay off. Dad Jokes are in and out like a crew of ninjas in an unlocked coal factory at midnight. Speaking of...

Example 1: What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

Sneakers!

Example 2: I don't trust those trees.

They seem kind of shady.

• They're sometimes lightly self-deprecating. Not in a destructive way, though. In that healthy way that reminds us all not to take ourselves too seriously.

Example 1: You know, people say they pick their nose, but I feel like I was just born with mine.

Example 2: I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes.

Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.

• They can be rather 'meta'. I'm not sure if there's a scientific study out there backing this statement up, but just from my own experience, I feel like 'going meta' can help ward off Alzheimers. It feels like taking my brain out of my skull and giving it a deep tissue massage. Seems like that has to be healthy in some way.

Example 1: I've got a great joke about construction, but I'm still working on it.

Example 2: I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn't like it.

• A good Dad Joke leaves you feeling better and lighter about life. And isn't that what Hugh Morris all about?

Example 1: A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "Hey, bartender. I'll have one beer and a mop."

Example 2: I asked my dog what's two minus two.

He said nothing.

And that's about all the shrimp I can think of.

Got any other reasons why Dad Jokes are the best? Any great Dad Jokes you'd like to share and lighten up all of our day? Feel free to fire at Will in the comments! (Just make sure you play by the above Dad Joke'ian Tenets!)

Photo of Will:

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