Most recently published stories in Humor.
“Psssssttt. How many bad words do you know?” Izaak’s six-year-old voice whispers during reading time. “You don’t have to say it out loud. Just show, with your fingers,” he points to his left hand.
Gnome Gnosis: Top 10 Reasons Gnomes Will Gradually Take Over Earth
This story was inspired by Shelby Hagood and her story titled " Gnomes Have Taken Over!" Within the magical worlds of myth and legend, a little but powerful force appears with the ability to rule the entire planet: the gnome. Gnomes, who are frequently described as delightful garden ornaments or cunning forest dwellers, are discreetly organizing a takeover that goes beyond their charming exteriors. Get ready as we reveal the top 10 reasons why gnomes are setting themselves up to dominate our globe without anyone knowing.
Pork Paradox: Top 10 Reasons Pigs Will Gradually Take Over Earth
A surprising candidate appears as a potential global dominator in the busy web of Earth's ecosystems: the common pig. Pigs are covertly planning a takeover that extends beyond their barnyard limits, while being frequently disregarded for their household duties or as delicious food. As we reveal the top 10 reasons why pigs are assuming the role of unwitting planet overlords, get ready to be shocked.
Pet humor 2024
Title: The Hilarious Misadventures of Whiskers - The Quirky Pet Chapter 1: The Arrival of Whiskers Once upon a time, in a small town called Sunnyville, there lived a peculiar family named the Hendersons. The Hendersons were known for their love of animals, and it was no surprise when they decided to welcome a new pet into their home.
- Top Story - February 2024
My experiment began when I found this odd bit of 90’s nostalgia online. I know what you’re thinking. Finally, an everything pizza seasoning endorsed by The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Millennials, look no further. This 4.4 ounce bottle of pizza-like flavor is available on amazon.com for $12.99. Also available, ‘The Shredder.’
The Politically Correct Fairy Tale
(Warning: This Story Is Not For The Humorously Challenged). Once upon a time. In a kingdom far, far away. 'The Council of Good Morals And Interesting Discussions' decided to buy real estate up on the flat topographic plains of the world. This land was far cheaper than their economically challenged land from low. And therefore, they decided to buy it.
We decided to meet at my place as my parents went out of town for two days and I was all alone at home, so I invited Payal for lunch at my place. But having strict Indian parents and living on different outskirts of Mumbai, it was difficult for her to make it up. Needless to say, Mumbai can separate people by distance but connect them by heart. So none of the reasons could stop the love birds to meet. She somehow managed to convince her parents to let her go out by making an excuse for group studies, the best excuse students make to convince their parents as parents generally give up just by the name of studies and that happened with her too. Poor parents!
- Top Story - February 2024
- Billy -
— Migration — THE Sponsor, Cousin Billy Kantor, would bring relatives escaping Russian Persecuting Pogroms filtering 2-3 at a time through Ellis Island, the Immigration reception area in New York. Not far from the Statue of Liberty, "Give us your Tired your Poor." And, putting them to work in his Haberdashery. "Billy Sells for Less" Sioux City, Iowa. Of course the suit-tie-and fedora were the 'Dress Code' of the day; probably not the case today.
Twelve Things You Need To Know About Dating Me.
Well, I guess we all have quirks, and yes, sadly, you can't date me because I am married! Oops! I just thought I'd let you know.
I STOOD PERFECTLY STILL AS I WAS TOLD TO DO. As I stood there, the dental scanner circled my head nearly hanging up in it's orbital trip of my head's circumference. To help out, I flinched a bit but was called back to stillness by the orthodontists insistent stammer, "stand still! ...Stand still... we'll have to get another round." He called back to the girl managing the scanner, "Run another one." She stepped back into the xray room to change my bitewings once and then again, on a later occaision when the machine could not pass around my head without hanging up. "Your head miss... your head seems to be a bit swollen. Let's reschedule this. Where are these going to again? How long do you have to get then in?" I wriggled fingers in the air to notify her that my mouth was still gagged by dental supplies. After releasing the gag cards from mmy teeth and cheeks, I told her that the military unit I was attached to insisted on the medical file being completed before next training date... in the next two weeks. It was after hours, and we were the only two left at the office, when she got a good reading but she managed to insert one last set and extend the rotor dimension for the scanner for a clear set of dental xrays. When she re-entered the room to release me from the interlocked boards set around the inside of mouth she asked about the "glow." It was not an expected sight of radiated light emitted by the dental xray machine or the lighting for an otherwise darkened medicalphotography area. She had turned out most light that was not emitted by themachine itself. The light she referred to was a bright green glow like that benerated by alien life forms so sought after by earthlings in and out of the "Roswell" top secret site run by NASA and the Central Intelligence Agency. The "green glow" that hovered about me, coaxed by the dental xray set up was surely something not anticipated. I mentioned my career focus in the military... Civil Engineering. That was nothing to raise a dander over. There had been an ammonia spill at the engineering office and the machines were down with a myriad of projects coming due. What we could not complete during a training session, the civilian sector would have to work through the details to complete. The Ozalid machine, the oldest of two machines in our section, was spilling the liquid and pouring excessive fumes from both the processing of work and the leakage created by its broken elements. Only two personnel were subjected to the small sideroom to run the designated sheets... three of one set and five to ten of each another set of ten reworked plans. Dawn was not set to the print room, she was ordered to "hone her skills for upcoming training at the tech school" and was being preserved for that. Two others arrived late and were spared for that cause. Rob and I took the dive swinging one after the other for one hour intervals of ammonia gas immersion... we were trained for that in basic, right? I mentioned the gas to the woman weilding dental cards into and out of my mouth.
Highlights of Arctic Exploration Polar Bears
the Arctic, but my polar bear encounters, even the brief ones, remain imprinted on my memory with surprising clarity. None more so than the encounter we had in Croker Bay, on the southern shores of Canada's Devon Island. It was early morning, well before breakfast. A heavy fog sat to the north, and our ship slowly cruised through the mirror pond waters in search for wildlife. Binoculars scanned the hillsides for any irregularities, any cream-colored dots amongst the browns and maroons of the Devon Island terrain.
Love and Laughter: A Valentine's Day Romp with Ethel and Harold
In the cozy confines of their quaint living room, Ethel and Harold, a delightful couple with a penchant for crossword puzzles and cozying up by the fireplace, found themselves embroiled in a lively debate about the enigmatic holiday known as Valentine's Day.