What's Full Bloom Without You
An Infinite Storyline
The journey has been long, the ride hasn't stopped - you've been by my side since as far back as I can recall. In times like these where friendships are hard to find - especially hard to keep, you're there. Three years ago we decided to move across the country and ditch our selected colleges, we'd become blissed in walking free. California was never in our plans but once we tasted it we knew we'd never be going back. Our families fought us to tell them what had happened - how could we change our minds so abruptly! To say they were pissed is little. We made it out, we got to California.
We were 18, alone in Hollywood and I could not have asked for a better partner in crime. I had no idea who I was, I didn't even know what it was I truly liked. In times like those you can feel so alone and not that we didn't have our moments but I never questioned your support - never questioned our friendship. So many people walked in and out of our lives we didn't even have time to see them go. We'd run free and submerge ourselves in every experience, we just wanted to feel, not like disappointment hadn't been one of our girls but we always got back up and we continued to grow. "To Feel" are very important words because I'd chosen them as one of the many rotating titles for those years. We wanted to feel everything, dive into experiences and that's exactly what we did.
During our time of "self discovery" we'd also dealt with drifting away from one of our best friends. She wanted other things and sadly we wouldn't really be part of it. I know it sounds a tad dramatic but she was like our sister, before two there were three. It broke our hearts and after a while we had to give up on that person but giving up on each other would never be part of the plan. We moved into our new apartment, nowhere close to Hollywood - Amen. Took on the roles we'd been escaping for the last year and got jobs, for the first time out and about working women. It was exciting and new, working had shifted a lot of things like going to bars and restaurants because now we felt part of the city. Our schedules would be all over the place and melt downs were bound to happen because we worked restaurant jobs so the stress was there but nothing eased me more than knowing I could knock on your door and talk to you about literally anything. You might not want to believe me but you were my rock for so long.
When I met my boyfriend you were nothing but supportive, you reminded me of how long I'd waited for a person like him and how capable I was because I was scared - truly. At that time I had a lot going and so did you, relationships had never gone our way and being broken-hearted was a theme. You held me through each and every single guy that came into my life and never judged my decisions, men had always been small highlights that magically dictated my thought process and after a while I started to disintegrate. My lows were so detrimental that I could feel myself disappearing with the crowd. We all know what it's like to be so broken-hearted that the kitchen floor becomes a resting spot for our tears, after a few disappointments I learned to keep my head up. Learning to get back up, strongly, wouldn't have been possible without an amazing best friend to help.
Now, things are changing and keeping up with piercing expectations was once manageable but we are now so beyond that, so beyond what people think. I'm proud of the women we've become and we still have so much to learn and see! Our paths are starting to go in different directions and it saddens me every time I think of it but we are nowhere near the end of this friendship. The breeze hasn't been as friendly as it used to be but I definitely trust it. Thank you for absolutely everything, love you endlessly.