What Does This Concept Mean about the Gap between Generations?

What exactly does the popular concept of intergenerational chasm refer to? Within the family, it refers to the difference in perspective, attitude, values, ​​and behavior between parents and children, the difference coming from the age difference, but especially from the macrosocial changes: parents and their children grow and develop in different socio-cultural environments. which impose other perspectives, values, attitudes.

But isn't the existence of this gap between generations within the family exaggerated? As real as these differences are, to say that the precipice prevents parents from understanding their children and children from understanding their parents is an extreme and pessimistic perspective.

There will always be children and teenagers who look at their parents condescendingly, raising their eyebrows at their conventionalism and conformity, looking at them as "relics". And there will always be parents watching their children sigh, wondering what has happened in the world and what is in the minds of children.

But it is always possible to reach an agreement that allows a touch of understanding between parents and children - and the key to understanding is precisely the awareness and acceptance of the existence of the gap between generations, of the implicit differences.

A parent who expects his child to be as he was at the time at that age only deepens this abyss and confirms the child's opinion that it cannot be understood. Therefore, we will never compare ourselves with those of younger generations (and by the way, not even older ones).

A child who ignores his parents based on the preconception that they have too old ideas does the same - he deepens the gap between generations, instead of trying to look at the parent simply as a loved one with whom he could talk, after all. open.

The gap between the generations is, however, real and without blockages of this type: today children indeed have other perspectives, attitudes, values. There has been talking for some time of a reversal of values. Perhaps the most important change for the new generations is the change of common values ​​into individual values ​​and the change from the abstract to the concrete ideal.

Specifically, instead of valuing ideals such as spiritual and intellectual fulfillment as a human being, today concrete ideals such as social and material fulfillment are predominantly valued. Instead of a common code of ethics that once existed, today everyone has great freedom to create an individual code, through which to declare their independence.

Instead of looking at the common good (family, group, nation), today the individual is king. Instead of accepting socially shared values, today you are tempted to ignore them or fight against them. Instead of a common system of values, today there is a diversity of groups, subcultures, each with its values.

This change has visible effects on the gap between generations in the family: parents who have lived most of their lives in modern society find it difficult to understand their children growing up in postmodern society.

Changes in perspective and values ​​are profound - and surface changes are visible through fashion and behavior. The abyss becomes deep when a parent does not accept that a child has other landmarks and that he feels the need to comply with them - and therefore to dress strangely (from the parent's point of view), to listen to strange music, to have interests and strange activities, to behave as the parent would not expect…

And children and young people only aggravate the differences, if they constantly adopt the rebellious attitude of "misunderstood", they look at them as if they are incomprehensible.

As has been said, however, it is sometimes exaggerated: the reality of this intergenerational chasm does not necessarily lead to the blockage of communication and lack of understanding. Although they have different perspectives and attitudes, parents and children have a much closer connection, which can overcome these differences (but both must try to maintain that connection).

After all, parents and children are bound by feelings, but also by certain similarities - moreover, it has been shown that, despite the adoption of a different lifestyle by the young, the core values, the deepest, remain the most common. those transmitted by parents during childhood. So, even if the child/teenager irritates or disorients you by the way they look, dress or talk, there will be those seeds planted by you as parents, which means that you share the essentials (going beyond the surface, those remain basic values).

Therefore, the gap between generations explains why so often both a parent and a child will start from the presumption that it will not be understood, it explains the inevitable conflicts, it explains the visible differences in attitude and perspective.

But it must not lead to a lack of understanding: with a little effort (and who could try to take the first step, if not the parent), with an understanding of the macrosocial changes that take place, understanding is always possible. As long as they try, with all sincerity and will, to communicate (which involves talking, but especially listening).

Recently, there has been talking of a diminution of this gap between generations: new parents no longer conform to the image of mature and "boring" adults, preoccupied only with responsibilities and worries, with routine interests.

The new parents remain little children, young people, which makes it easier for them to get along with their children. But this also means that the last generations of parents are somewhat confused - neither are responsible adults yet, but they are no longer carefree young people. I run away from a life full of responsibilities, which are in step with the new changes, with technology, and with fashion.

Which brings them closer to their children. But one question remains: can they be responsible parents, as long as they still want to live a life without responsibilities? Isn't the gap between generations a requirement, a necessity within the family: becoming a parent means becoming an adult, raising a child and a teenager means thinking differently and taking the burden. Being a parent doesn't just mean being a friend to your child