To My Best Friend

To my Best Friend,

You know who you are. You've been with me for so many of my ups and downs, and you've stuck through them with me for it all. We met in college, freshman year, and it was a fast friendship. We were on the same floor in the same dorm, that definitely helped. We had so many good times, but you already know that. I don’t know if you look back fondly at our drinking fountain conversations at ungodly hours of the night, but I do.

You are one of the brightest highlights of my college experience. You were there for my 21st birthday, making sure I went out to get my free drink even though I had an exam the next day. I know I’m a pain, sometimes, but you never let that stop you from hanging out with me. That’s what I’m writing this letter for, to tell you thank you. Thank you for the times that you were there when I’m sure I was hard to love. When I needed someone the most, you were always there. I will be forever grateful for that.

The thing I’m most thankful for, though, is when you were there when I finally came to accept myself. I know I put you through some pretty awful things during that time frame. I’ll never stop being sorry for that. I hope you know that. I know that the week where we stopped talking while I processed my life and who I was was absolutely awful to you. I can’t claim to know what was going on in your head when we finally talked again. All I can talk about is what I was fortunate enough to get from you then. Coming out to you was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done, but it was the best thing, too.

You helped me through my fear. Read that again, and take it in. I need you to understand how important that was for me. I don’t know where I would be today, if you hadn’t helped me then. I wouldn’t be the me I am today. I’m not even sure I’d still be here, to be honest. I never told you that. I’ve never told anyone that, actually. I was in a pretty dark space at that time. It got worse when I had to face it head on. But your acceptance that day, when you had every right to be mad at me instead, made all the difference.

We don’t see each other as much, anymore. Leaving college and becoming adults with real jobs really put a damper on that. Yet I always look forward to every single time we get to see each other. You’ll always be one of the most special people to me. I hope you know that, because I know I don’t say it often enough. I hope that even though we can’t see each other that often, that you’ll still be there for all my future big moments. Know, that I’ll always come to yours.

I don’t know if you’ll ever read this. If you do, it’ll be by chance. Just know, that I love you. I will always love you, even when life gets in the way and we can’t see each other in over a year. You’re one of the strongest people I know. You were definitely one of my biggest anchors in college. I know I never stated your name in this letter, but you’ll know if this is for you. So here it is. Thank you. Thank you for everything you’ve ever done for me. Thank you holding my hand when I needed it the most.

- Cody