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The Value of Honesty in a World of Facades

Are you an honest person? And does it even matter?

By Alicja SnarskaPublished 13 days ago 3 min read
The Value of Honesty in a World of Facades
Photo by Michael Carruth on Unsplash

Before we delve into this topic, take a moment to ask yourself a simple question: Are you an honest person? Reflect on your interactions with family, friends, and colleagues. Can you truly claim that honesty defines you?

Personally, I've been on a journey to embrace honesty, with mixed results. It all began when I shared my story of working for Microsoft for 3.5 years. The response I received was overwhelming, but what struck me most was the surprise many expressed about my honesty. It seemed as though no one expected to find something genuine on the internet.

As I pondered this, I realized that it's relatively rare to share our whole truth with the world. Despite the countless coaches and motivational speakers urging us to be authentic, the reality often falls short. We humans construct different facades, donning various masks until we lose sight of our true selves. Whether it's pretending to be constantly cheerful, unfailingly reliable, or perpetually knowledgeable, we all wear these masks. The question is, why? What are we trying to achieve, or more importantly, what are we attempting to avoid?

Let's explore a couple of popular examples:

1. Online Facades: Consider the content we encounter on social media platforms like Instagram. It's a parade of selfies, pictures with friends, snapshots of activities, gadgets, and delectable meals—all polished, filtered, and posed. We meticulously curate our online personas, showcasing only what we want others to see while concealing the rest. But is this genuine? Is it honest? Or are we, like everyone else, crafting a version of ourselves that fits in seamlessly with the digital landscape?

2. Offline Auto-Censorship: The need to present our best selves extends beyond the digital realm. At work, we may withhold our opinions or avoid taking on innovative projects due to fear—fear of being perceived as incompetent or risking job security. Among friends, we often refrain from sharing our true feelings or struggles, fearing judgment or alienation. And don't even get me started on dating, where the pressure to present a flawless image can be overwhelming.

By now, it's evident that complete honesty isn't the norm. It seems we all engage in some form of self-editing or pretense, consciously or unconsciously. But does it matter? Are we justified in living in a society of facades, where even self-honesty is a monumental challenge?

I've dedicated myself to being as true as possible, both to others and to myself. Yet, it's an ongoing struggle. Even with intention and mindfulness, I find myself grappling with questions about who I truly am and the meaning behind my emotions. It's a monumental effort.

However, there is potential for tremendous growth in embracing this challenge. Once we learn to confront our own emotions and be 100% honest with ourselves, we can genuinely be there for others. Few people truly share on a deep level because they fear exposing their vulnerabilities, don't want to burden others, or feel that their openness won't be reciprocated with the support they need.

But does this resonate with you? It certainly does with me, although I sometimes question if I understand how the world operates today. It raises broader questions about our values and priorities. What matters most in your life? Is it relationships, wealth, family, or simply having fun? Perhaps, honesty isn't a prerequisite for making money or enjoying life.

Personally, I hold honesty in high regard and strive to embody it. I believe in sharing not only my successes but also my failures, and in being transparent about my emotions. However, I can't help but wonder if it's getting me anywhere. In a world where everyone is chasing their own version of success, whether it's starting a family, owning a luxury car, or building a thriving business, it's easy to feel that no one really cares about the pursuit of truth.

So, if you find it challenging to be completely honest with yourself and the world, don't fret. Maybe it doesn't matter as long as you genuinely believe you're doing well in your own way.

After all, authenticity, like beauty, often lies in the eye of the beholder.

P.S. If you enjoyed this article, leave some love (claps or/and follow) it makes a huge difference fo rme and I deeply appreciate all the support.


About the Creator

Alicja Snarska

I come from Poland, lived in US and did the "digital nomad" thing for 2 years. This got me to Mexico, where I found love and stayed 🫶🏼

Writing about philosophy, psychology, economy and sometimes other random things.

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  • Alex H Mittelman 13 days ago

    Great work! Fantastic story!

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