The Seven Stages of Love

Love is a universal emotion that has been explored through various mediums such as poetry, literature, and art. In the novel “Namal” by Nimra Ahmed, the concept of love is discussed in great detail. The author beautifully captures the essence of each level of love and the intricate details of the journey toward true love. Here, we will explore the different levels of love as depicted in “Namal,” examining the unique characteristics of each level and how they contribute to a person’s experience of love.

Attraction

The first level of love is “Attraction” because it establishes a “relationship” between the person and their beloved. It is based on physical appearance, charm, and charisma. It is a feeling of being drawn towards someone and wanting to know them better. At this stage, a person starts to admire and appreciate the physical and behavioral traits of their beloved. They may feel butterflies in their stomach or experience a rush of adrenaline when they see their beloved, but their feelings are mostly superficial and are not yet based on a deep emotional connection.

Infatuation

After “Attraction” comes “Infatuation,” where the person’s heart fully submits to the beloved with complete devotion, and they become captivated by their charm. This can result in an intense desire to be close to the beloved at all times, as well as feelings of euphoria and a sense of being on cloud nine. However, it is important to note that infatuation is not true love, and it may not last forever. In fact, it is often a temporary state that fades away over time.

Gharaam(love)

The third level is “Gharaam” which is mentioned in the Quran as

اِنَّ عَذَابَهَا كَانَ غَرَامًا

“Indeed, its punishment is ever adhering”.

Here the word “Gharaam” is used and its literal meaning is inseparable, so in the ayah, it means that the punishment is inseparable, adherent, and attached. But the interesting part is that, in Arabic, the word gharaam is used for love. It’s the stage where the feeling of love sits permanently and sticks to the heart and cannot be removed.

Ishq(Passion)

“Love” is followed by “Passion,” which is the extreme level of love. The word “Passion” is used for a kind of affection between a man and a woman that is considered inappropriate. This term does not imply honor or dignity.

Shauq(Longing)

After “Passion,” there is “Longing.” This is the name of the journey of the heart, which starts towards the beloved with full intensity. It applies to the Almighty God as well. Allah knows that His friends eagerly await to meet Him, so He has set a time for them to meet Him. At that time, those who seek His help in their troubles and problems will meet Him, and their hearts will be filled with the emotions of love.

Ibadat(worship)

“After Shauq comes ‘Ibadat’, which means that a person starts worshipping their beloved. The one who worships their beloved becomes their ‘Abd’ (slave). They offer all their humility and self-respect at the feet of their beloved. To love a human being in this way is not out of compulsion or injustice, but rather out of pure love, and to humiliate oneself before one beloved. However, to love Allah in this way means to bow down before Him, to remove every veil from one’s face, to reveal the state of one’s heart, to whisper prayers in front of Him, and to make supplications to Him. This is ‘Ibadat’, and worship is the culmination of love. The one who does not worship Allah does not love Him.”

Khilat

After this, the highest level of love is Khilat. It is the name of the state of the heart where there is no room for anyone else except the beloved, nor does the heart tolerate any partnership. Only two people were blessed with this state by Allah Almighty, Ibrahim (Abraham) (peace be upon him) and Muhammad (peace be upon him). These two great prophets sacrificed a lot to attain this state. We may not be able to reach this level, but we can strive towards it through worship (ibadah).”

In conclusion, love is an intense emotion that has many levels, and each level has its unique significance. We can strive to attain the highest level of love, but it requires immense dedication, sacrifice, and submission to our beloved. Nimra Ahmad’s novel “Namal” beautifully captures the essence of love and its different stages.