The Results Are In

[D:] Dating app algorithms don't know anything. I'm so glad I gave this a shot. This guy is so nice. I don't know how we could have possibly been anywhere near 55% in our match!

[L:] well I'm glad, hopefully it keeps going well. Text when you can, love you!

[D:] Love you too!

I flashed a million dollar smile at my date for the evening, holding my glass of Merlot wine by my blushing face as I surveyed his comfortable body language on my sofa. Travis was dressed in jeans, dirty work boots, and a clean t-shirt that advertised his favorite country band, which had pleased me when he showed up for our first official date. I hadn't wanted to get too dressed up since we were having a relaxing night in, so I had also worn jeans and a comfortable, simple blue top advertising Woodstock. We had gotten through plenty of enjoyable conversations; he didn't drink anything I offered, but he didn't mind me sipping on my flavor of the month while we hung out. The TV was on in the background, but the talking was going so well I'd muted it a while ago. I lowered the glass to rest on my leg and adjusted my body to face him more, hoping to show my interest in what he was saying.

We had been talking for hours, yet he turned toward me and rested his elbow on the back of the couch, returning the interest with his adjusted position. I was delighted to see his reactions working in tandem with mine.

"Dana, I was hoping to really put you to the test here and see just how much alike we are. What d'ya think?"

"I think..." I trailed off, pondering the weight of his question. "I think maybe testing each other might be a little much on a first date, but I can't deny I'm curious. What did you have in mind?"

His eyes narrowed. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

No, I wasn't. "Lay it on me."

"The movie Dude Where's My Car? Funny, or no?"

"No." I stared Travis directly in his dark blue eyes as he stared back in mine, the silence pounding in my ears until he broke eye contact. He threw his hands in the air with a giant grin.

"Thank you!"

"Oh my god, no way, all of my friends love that movie!"I laughed, sitting my glass on the side table so I wouldn't drop it in my amusement.

"Mine too!" Travis chuckled and clapped his hands in appreciation of our bonding moment. "I can't stand it!"

"Ugh, that's so good, because I was actually afraid for a minute." I smiled and shook my head at how nervous he had me for a moment's time. "Seriously, though, you had me worried when you said you were going to test me."

"Why's that?"

"Because, I don't know, I was worried that the one wrong thing would happen that might ruin what's otherwise a perfect date." I blushed hard, realizing how comfortable I'd been to let slip such a comment, and hoped he didn't overreact to it. To my heart's entire contentment, he responded positively.

"You were thinkin' it was perfect too, huh?" He returned his own dazzling grin, reaching his hand out and landing it on my knee. He was insanely cute, and I was falling for that easily.

"I was, actually." My tone was almost becoming breathless as I wondered if this was it. That moment before we would share our first kiss and fireworks would explode above us because the angels in heaven were declaring us soul mates. It sure felt like it; I've been on enough dates to know what that moment before the first kiss felt like, and this was going somewhere great. He leaned forward and pushed a lock of my auburn hair off my face, which had purposely been shaken forward in embarrassment over my "perfect" comment.

I waited for what felt like forever until his lips met mine.

To my dismay, the kiss felt slightly off. I enjoyed the feeling, but there was something that felt sort of amiss. You know when you're enjoying the flavor of a meal but something just seems wrong, and you suddenly end up with food poisoning six hours later? That's kind of what it felt like. My body was confusing itself with my brain because my brain was absolutely sure this guy was it.

The kiss ended and he looked breathless.

"That was amazing." Travis's expression looked so content, I couldn't help but smile again, thinking maybe we just needed some practice. Not a big deal, right? Kissing is something that can improve, for sure. It's not like every single aspect of him had to be perfect right off the bat.

I plucked my glass of wine off the side table and took a few more sips, and Travis's cell phone started ringing in his back pocket.

"Aw, hell, I'm sorry. Can you hang on for a sec?"

"Sure."

He got up and walked out the front door to take the call, which I didn't mind, as it was none of my business. That gave me a chance to message my best friend, Lily, again.

[D:] We had the first kiss. Now idk what to do.

[L:] what's wrong?

[D:] Everything has been great so far but the kiss didn't feel entirely right. Is that weird?

[L:] No, it isn't weird

[L:] I've had a lot of kisses feel weird to me and the relationship isnt based on how good THAT is if you know what I mean lol

[D:] okay Lil thanks for that because I'm definitely not interested in going that far with it tonight.

[L:] I'm js lol

[D:] Okay, I'm going to chill out. He's coming back from a phone call. I'll text you if there's any more emergencies. Will you be up?

[L:] maybe but you can text no matter what

[D:] Thanks, I think he is probably leaving soon. He's been here forever.

He returned with his phone in his hand, smelling strongly of cigarette smoke, which threw me off a bit.

"Sorry, that was my cousin, I'm meetin' up with her tomorrow to work on her truck."

"No worries." I smiled and scrunched my nose, unable to ignore the strength of the scent. "You smoke?"

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that, hope you don't mind. I thought I aired it out all right." Travis shook his jacket out a bit and hovered awkwardly, not sitting back down. "Everything good?"

"No, it's fine, I mean I wish you'd mentioned it while we talked but it's not that big of a deal. As long as it stays outside." I was starting to feel a pit form in my stomach, worrying that these little offbeat feelings were a sign that things were not going to end well for our date night. I hated feeling negative about it, but the slightly uncomfortable kiss was setting off a small paranoia in me.

"Cool." He unleashed a loud belch, followed up by a sincere chuckle at himself and a soft whisper of a swear word.

I raised my eyebrows. Was he serious?

"Well, I think it's about time to hit the road, Dana. I gotta get up early for work tomorrow. I've had an amazing time though, really, and I'd like to do it again sometime."

"Yeah, we can talk that out. Thanks for coming by!" I spoke with a little more enthusiasm about his departure than I should have, but he didn't seem to notice as I stood up. I was hastily debating how to get out of a goodnight kiss or any solid commitment to plans. I didn't really want to leave a strong impression that another date was possible until I had more time to think. I needed to really put some effort into deciding how I felt about everything. Slowing the decision-making process down is important and I was determined to do that.

Travis and I walked together to my front door. Luckily, he stepped outside immediately as if he were suddenly in a rush, and he glanced back at me.

"Sorry, I'm not in a rush or nothin', I'm just starving." I smirked at my internal prediction. "'Bout to run on home and have a sammich and get to bed."

There it was.

I felt a bubble of irritation grow in my chest as my skin flushed angrily. The word...that word is the most horrific word on the planet. If I had any level of a pet peeve, it was THAT word, and I couldn't believe I had forgotten to mention this in my dating profile. It was stupid, and I have never had a good reason for it, but the sound of the word makes my skin feel like it's crawling off my body. I was revolted, completely turned off on a level I didn't remember experiencing in a long time.

There was the thing that ruined the whole freaking night.

Sammich.

I hate the word "sammich."

There was no recovering from this. I stared at him in pure disgust, bid him goodnight, and shut the door. I swiftly crossed the room and retrieved my wine glass, taking the last two gulps down before grabbing my phone.

[D:] I'm pretty sure I'm never doubting an algorithm ever again. Ugh. Text me tomorrow, he's gone and I'm going to bed.