The Power of Choice

Life constantly presents us with a choice; it's the ownership of the consequences we find difficult.

Last month, during an online group coaching session to become a better performer, my coach asked me this simple yet profound question:

"Why don't you have a choice?"

Her question metaphorically stopped me in my tracks, and as I thought, it felt like I was a train hurtling past my destination, with my brake lever detached and in my hand.

As I pondered the question, all I could smell and hear was metal against metal as my thoughts collided with the obvious realisation that I do have a choice; I always have a choice.

The Illusion of Force

As my coach explained, the choice is not and never the problem but instead my understanding and relationship to the consequences, that is.

It's easy to fall into the trap of believing outside forces or obligations leave us no choice but to act a certain way. Take, for example, if tomorrow and a series of tomorrows I decide not to go to work and spend my days in bed.

No one will physically force me to work, but my contract might.

But even with the contract, I still have a choice.

Reframing what we do based on what we want, as opposed to what we have to/ must do/ should do, means taking responsibility for the choices we have and make.

I may not like the consequences if it leads me to eventually lose my job, mortgage, house and potentially family, but the point is the decision to honour the contract and work is always mine.

Taking Ownership

I know it may not necessarily feel it, and I may use words like. I have to, I must, I should, but these are language and phrases we use to police and convince ourselves that we don't have a choice.

But life is a choice; it is a series of decisions that you and those who came before you make — It always has been and always will be.

What we have to understand is that our relationship to that choice is what matters.

A relationship based on who and what we value is a relationship that honours our authentic self.

Reframing what we do based on what we want, as opposed to what we have to/ must do/ should do, means taking responsibility for the choices we have and make.

So, with this awareness, we stand along the line of an existing realisation or at the beginning of a potential powerful transformation — if we choose to.

If we decide to pull the thread and follow, what comes next are a series of decisions to continue and direct our continued attention through the rifts and valleys of life.

Your life consists of a series of decisions only you can make. So choose wisely and own the outcomes — then you hold the agency and power.

This is an affiliate link to The Fearless Performer coaching programme. I get a small commission if you sign up. This course has opened my mind, changing how I think about presenting and performing for the better.