The heartbroken club

You always said communication was key. So here’s me communicating with you. Fuck you.

Yes, fuck you. You knew the answer but made me wait over more than a WEEK? You had my hopes high from what you told me. The sad part? After you left, I called Alba right away and cried in the car. She stayed on the phone with me while I was trying to tell her what happened. The words coming out of my sobs. I knew you chose her. It was obvious. Yet, I still needed closure. It’s just me. I needed the closure to finally get you out of my head for good this time. It’s weird how I pushed you back. You always came back. I’m not going to lie, yes I had other people, but YOU did too. I wasn’t going to wait forever. Before you kissed me, I was already tired of waiting. I gave up. You knew I did. I tried to be your friend like how you wanted us to be. I tried everything I could. I didn’t make the first move cause you didn’t hint anything at me. I did throw many though. So, when I say fuck you, it isn’t because you chose her. I hope she treats you better. I’m happy you found her and she makes you happy. Well I hope you are. I don’t check up on you anymore. Basically got you muted on everything. You’re muted out of my life. It’s just something it has to be done. When I write this story, it’s not because I want a response. It’s how I get closure and to help people who are going through similar things.

When I say fuck you. It’s because you made me wait for an answer you ALREADY knew. You made me lose sleep. You didn’t know, but for that amount of time, I only slept about fifteen hours in that whole week in total. Hoping you texted back. Did you know that I didn’t sleep on “your” side of the bed? I bought a new one. One that you will never touch or lay on. A clean state. I got your earrings so if you want them back let me know. I’m not going to remember it while my main focus is to ignore you and never talk to you unless we need to. Communication right? I’m always awkward with people besides Alba since she’s the only person that can understand my language without me needing to talk. She learned through my struggles of communication. I will forever be grateful for her. She helped me through my darkest times. She’s the reason that I am here. Alba, I know you’re reading this. So thank you, sunflower.

I think since you’re finally off of my mind. I feel relieved. Free. I don’t have to think about what you’ll like anymore or live up to the standards or expectations. So while i’m saying fuck you. Here’s a thank you for letting me free. Have a nice life and live it. Go out and have fun. Heartbreaks happen. I’m glad this one did.

To the people who feel broken right now: you got this. Nobody can fix you, but yourself. They may hand you the pieces but you’re the one who will decide if you want to put the glue on and fix it. You. got. this. There will be better days. These are just chapters not the final pages. Finish the series. Finish the final master piece. Travel to the places you always wanted. If you finished something, find something else. I got through it. I know you will too.