The Good, The Bad And The Ugly

Life has many stages the good, the bad and the ugly. This story is about the ugly and for a young girl we will call her Alice life was nothing but ugly. See Alice grew up in a strong Christian loving home but somewhere along the lines that all fell apart and Alice spiraled into a highly toxic and dangerous life of sex, drugs and crime, the type of life that Alice did not belong in. Alice was young a ripe old age of 19 when she got introduced to a life, she had never thought possible, a life that showed her a whole other way of living, a life of fake love, crime, and methamphetamines. For those of you who might not be familiar with the word methamphetamines let me give you a quick overview of what that word is. Methamphetamines is a lethal, dangerous, and highly addictive drug that a lot of teens and young people have experimented with and it quickly became a love hate relationship, like a moth to a flame they are drawn in completely and full on addicted. Methamphetamines will take a good person and drag them down a dark, lonely, and desperate road that seems to never end. For Alice, this way of living was her reality but the only thing that separated Alice from the other meth addicts she knows is that the meth has yet to steal her heart for humanity, Alice still wanted to love and be loved, but that would soon change and faster than she expects it to. Alice was still wet behind the ears when it comes down to the truth behind her meth addiction, she had no clue about street life or how to survive it, so she turned to the ones who knew it all about this game, she turned to the drug dealers. See Alice was a gorgeous girl. She was tall and thin with a coke bottle shape, long straight, soft, blonde hair, a fair complexion, and a smile that could light up an entire room. All the guys wanted her, and the girls wanted to be her, but she never would have seen that. Anyway, Alice had a thing for the drug dealers, they kept her high and happy and she well she kept them happy as well. Alice was like the modern-day Marilyn Monroe, she looked like a goddess and unfortunately for her it seemed that her best asset was between her thighs. She could have been a high paid porn star with as good as that girl could lay it down on a man, to say the least she never got any complaints from the men, she was good at being bad and bad at being good. Anyway, as I was saying Alice was all about dating the drug dealers, for a young and wet behind the ears meth addict who did not have a clue about the streets and how to stay alive through it all, no job and certainly no money dating a drug dealer is the way to go. Think about it, having a drug dealer as your boyfriend was ideal in this type of situation but it was a position that not just any girl could fill, most drug dealers have an extremely specific type in women and Alice sure fit the bill and as it happens Alice had met and fell in love with a real thug like drug dealer, we will call him Prince. Prince was a bit older than Alice, no real job, a pocket full of meth and another pocket full of cash and he had no problems with spending that cash on Alice so long as she always kept him happy and supplied with what he wanted from her the most, sex. If Alice followed his wants and demands he had no issue with keeping her high and happy with anything and everything she wanted or needed. It was like Alice was living the all-American dream just on the other side of the tracks. But the fairy tale soon came crashing down and in the blink of an eye everything changed and not for the greater good either. It was just a matter of time before Alice would get the firsthand view of the cold hard truth behind Prince and this fairy tale lifestyle, she had become used to. Prince become aggressive quick, he formed a hair trigger temper, and anything could set him off at any time, he became verbally aggressive talking bad to Alice and totally disrespecting her, and before she knew it Prince was hitting her a lot and she was having a tough time trying to keep the bruises and black eyes covered up. Turns out Prince was not the prince she thought he was. See Alice had fell in love and Prince had fell in lust, but it had gotten to the point that regardless of how much sex they had or how satisfied she tried to keep him Prince had gotten all he wanted from Alice and no longer wanted or needed her and kicked her to the curb without a clue or place to go. Alice was to say the least devastated, lost, scared and now homeless. With all the mess and confusion going on it bothered her at first but that did not last long when she bumped into yet another drug dealer claiming that he would move Alice into his spot, supply her with all things that she needed and wanted, provide her with a safe and comfortable place to stay and would keep the meth in high supply if she in return kept him happy too. After leaving one trap house and one drug dealer boyfriend and being left to fend for herself she has managed to find and shack up with another drug dealer with a cute smile and a way with words, Alice was so captivated by the moment that she quickly forgot about the most recent turn of events that had led her to where she was now. Matter of fact after a few hits of methamphetamines she had forgotten about everything to be exact. She had got so lost in the glory of the moment and having a place to go so quickly after being thrown away like garbage she did not stop to think about the days to come and how they could play out and if she needed to draw up a backup plan just in case things ended up going south like the last guy did that she threw caution to the wind and let her defenses down again, she got comfortable again and not long after maybe a good two weeks had passed and tragedy had struck again, she got into a disagreement with the new guy over her not holding up her end of the bargain and keeping him satisfied like she agreed but yet he held up his promise by giving her food, clothing, shelter, and keeping the party favors flowing like water. He felt as though she really had no intentions of sticking to her end of the deal and he felt that she was only taking advantage of him and that bothered him, so much so that just like the last guy he told her she needed to leave, he was quite upset that he had seen a girl in need, and she took his kindness for weakness instead of being appreciative for all he did to help when he did not have to. Even this did not phase Alice either, she just thought to herself " oh well no need to sweat the small stuff she would just find someone else. Alice did not even stop and realize that there was already a pattern of the same type of tragedies happening to her. Although she had not found another place to go as quickly as she had the last time and she had to spend a few nights sleeping on the streets and eating her meals from the local homeless soup kitchens. By now she was really needing a shower and a clean change of clothes and was really wishing she had not blown her chances and burned her bridges with the last few people that were willing to show her some kindness and try to help her. Or were their hearts in the right place to begin with? Could it be that they only tried to help her for their own personal gain somehow? All the sudden all these spiteful thoughts went flowing through her mind and Alice began to see things for what they really were and not through rose colored glasses. Just then Alice realized that the last two guys that had let her stay then threw her out were only using her until they did not need her anymore then gave her the boot. To a normal person this would have been heart breaking but for Alice this only seemed to make her mad and turn and hateful towards people, she began building a deep dislike and hatred towards other people, she started seeking revenge out on all the people who wronged her, she formed an even deeper hatred for other women so much so that Alice could not even be in the same room with another girl and her blood would start boiling and she was ready to fight her for no reason at all. These feelings she was having although dark and scary at times were feelings, she was not used to her embraced them and took off running with them. Word on the street was Alice was not the one anyone would want to find themselves tangoing with for any reason. Alice had become extremely aggressive and violent towards people especially those who she found competition in or those she felt could, would or will do her wrong in some way, she had started to rack up several violent charges, she had gotten and earned quite the name and reputation for herself in the streets. People began to leave her alone more as they soon found out Alice was going to stand her ground. One thing I never mentioned about Alice is that she was kind of a loud mouth at times she was going to make her presence known everywhere she went, she had no issues with speaking her mind when it came to unjustified stuff, she was quick to voice her opinion regardless if anyone liked it or not, she was also very opinionated but over the years that she battled this nasty addiction to methamphetamines she had slowly began to gain a high level of respect from the small time, trigger happy, cocky attitude drug dealers that lined the streets all up and down her usual hangout on Broadway ST, after a while she became well protected by them too they always had her back when anything would come about and always spoke highly of her in conversation. This fact alone had a lot of girls hating her and jealous to boot. But Alice knew that if she were going to be able to make it, she could not be bothered by what everyone thought about her. Well Alice ended up being on the streets and victim to the world of sex, drugs, and fast money off and on for a lot of years 15 to be exact, she had a rough time trying to get through this addiction and battling her demons but for the grace of God she pulled through this tragic era of her life and was able to become normal once again. Alice finally found her a man that adores her, her son is all grown up and 17 now, her life has finally become manageable again, she had got a good job though she could not stand it there she did anyway for almost 2 years, she was doing great until one fateful day she was outside her job smoking and chatting with this older than her devilishly handsome guy and they were talking about her past addiction and how long she had been clean when he invited her to his apartment after work, as usual she was curious about this guy so she accepted his invitation little did she know that visit was going to set the course for the next 2 years or more but once getting to his apartment and sitting on his couch she happen to notice that on the coffee table there sat a bag of methamphetamines and a smoking device, at first she refused it and tried as hard as she possibly could to fight the urges to smoke but after a while of it sitting there in her face the temptation was too strong for her, she should have just got up and left right then but she did not want to be rude or seem like she was being judgmental so she thought she could tough it out and she could not. It was only moments later, and she was smoking meth again. This took Alice and her family for a tailspin, she tried to control it and keep it under wraps and managed to do so for a couple months but then the big obvious warning signs began to pop up, she suddenly lost interest in things she normally loved to do, she became really moody and edgy all the time snapping at people for the littlest things, she was so angry all the time, she started withdrawing away from her friends and family and went into a total isolation from everyone, her shame was apparent and every time anyone would see her or try to talk to her she would always be looking down towards the ground she never could look anyone in their eyes, she spoke poorly about herself as though she really believed what she was saying about herself, she did not stand for anything so she fell for everything. The worst part of her life that she thought she had finally gotten past had unleashed its fury on her once again. She was so ashamed of herself and the lack of control she had over her addiction that she stayed away from her family for the longest at least the first 3 4 months before she finally snapped out of the guilt and shame and reached out to her mom, since then she has really pulled herself up again and has made some major improvements. It appears there is a light at the end of her tunnel for once and now, she has the overwhelming feeling inside that all is going to be ok. Now Alice just sits back and recounts all the events of her life and she likes to smile when she thinks about how she made it through the good, the bad and the ugly.