The first

It’s many ways that people define and explain who their first love was, and the first love is supposed to be unforgettable and tremendous to the soul and heart. I mean I feel that the first love is something that will let you know what type of love you want to keep for the rest of your life with that particular person or if it ends you’ll know the type of love that you want to have and what you need with the next person that catches your eye one day. Plus, the first can also be painful or bittersweet that can make your heart hurt.

My first love was years ago, it’s something that I can say that can be written with beauty and tragedy. The reason why is because Somethings happened within the relationship I can never look or feel the same about love because of the events that had occurred even if I tried and trust me, I do try. Yet, there were memories that were beautiful, and I thank them for showing me both versions while being with them because I know the love I want to have and the love I want to let go of. Even though, it took me a long time to let go and to heal from those things that I still haven’t gotten completely better with. a part of me knows that it’s okay and everything takes to progress the other part still struggles to meet with the part that knows that it’s okay. Also, I can’t say that I hate them. Although people feel I should or should never forgive them for the things that happened, but I don’t blame them for everything and as people, we change every day. The way that people change can be good or bad but no matter what they become I feel hate shouldn’t be held towards them. I only see it as you hurting you more than it will ever hurt them because while your angry and hurt with them they could be mostly likely already moving forward with their life or not angry with you at all. Plus, you can’t really change the past and sometimes I wish I could just like anyone else in the world probably, but I know if this didn’t happen like with them, I wouldn’t know what I know now. I wouldn’t know what I didn’t deserve in my love life and needed to have deeply.

By then, I met the sweetest kindest person that took my heart and makes me feel like I’m loved in all the right ways. Now, I know they aren’t my first or my second love but to me, they are my first purest sweetest kind of love or do I say my first matures type of love? Words can’t match the thought of them in my eyes and words aren’t enough for them to me. Their smile takes me to cloud nine and their love for me is all I ever wanted because they try to understand me and make me feel like I’m the only thing they see. They hear me and I feel that they would love me when I’m at my worse just as much as my best. Even if it’s not forever or our forever of our lives the thing is, I feel that with them just coming into my life they made things in my heart feel lighter and loving me can be sweet and gentle. I appreciate them for dealing with me because it isn’t always the best days but I know they wouldn’t bring me down when there are days like that because they not only love but respect me that’s just something that I never had truthfully come in the right ways or all the time. I love you, I think that I will always love you for rest of my days because I never had a love like yours that is so foreign to me but everything that I ever dreamed.