The Conversation

What can I say, when something has awakened inside you that begins to stir it brings up things that has been there all along from the very beginning? What awakes it? I have been told a lot of things by different people who have experienced an awakening. In my case it was the meeting of someone.

I took this trip to New Orleans to get away from some problems of my life. Another failed relationship has become a habit that I wanted to stop. Why is it we knowingly get involved with someone that there are all these signs and warnings that you just ignore?

When I first saw him, I was in a bar on Bourbon Street. He was standing there watching me for at least an hour. It was as though a bright light was shining down upon him that helped me to notice. I had met a group of people from the United Kingdom and was having a great time dancing, drinking and laughing. Finally, he approached me. I somehow knew that he would. I was on the dance floor and he interrupted the dance asking me questions. The guy I was dancing with was a little taken back and to be honest it is as though that guy dissipated before my eyes. All I could see was this striking person standing in front of me that seemed so familiar. But I could not hear what he was asking me because of the loud music. He was acting as though he already knew me and was a little jealous, I had continued dancing with someone and had not come up to him because he knew I had noticed him.

Once we moved to the back of the bar so we could hear each other talk. He spoke of me like he knew me for years. We talked a deep conversation and he told me things about myself like he had known me for a long time. We hung out fora couple of days sporadically and we had great conversations and the way he spoke about me helped me to realize my own self-worth. It was time for him to leave because he was on a cross country road trip with his friends from halfway around the world and he would be returning home soon. Plus, I had to still deal with a failed marriage when I returned home.

Not that it seemed to matter much but there was a considerable age difference with myself being the older one. On saying our final goodbyes, I watched him walk away with his head looking down to the floor as I stood there by my room door watching him it is like suddenly the hallway become a dusty old path with trees aligning him on each side. I could feel this remembrance of this hurtful pain deep in my heart and soul. It was like I was remembering something and that I have lived this before. As this day went on the sadness grew deeper and deeper. It was so unexplainable and has stayed with me for years.

When I returned home, I knew exactly what I needed to do. It took some time but i got out of a toxic relationship. I cared about his wellbeing so, it took a little time. All along too I was experiencing things I have never experienced. A thing called synchronicity was happening to me in my life and it was like perfectly timed messages from the universe trying to help me understand what was happening to me. It was leading me to books, songs, people and even car bumper stickers. This made me feel so connected to the universe and I began to see the larger picture of life and eventually it helped me to have a clearer understanding.

And I will never forget on that first night how the bar was closing, and I had to run upstairs to go to the rest room and when I came back down the steps he was gone. It was like my heart fell into the pit of my stomach and I was looking around and before I knew it a bar employee came behind me and he was whisking me out to one of the doors and I am like, "Wait I was talking to someone!" As I was going toward the door there he was, anxiously waiting by the door and he had this concerned look on his face and he said, "I was scared I wouldn't see you leave!" At that moment as we looked into each other’s eyes, I no longer saw him as someone I just met, but someone I have known for a long, long time. And we began walking down those old uneven brick streets of Bourbon Street that was nearly vacant because of the late-night hour and he suddenly stopped and gave me this warm embrace and we slowly began to dance right there. Not to any music you could hear but to the music of our souls.

Song Lyrics:

There is a road that leads you to somewhere brand new, under construction means you got there way too soon. Take the next exit cause there someone there to meet. Their waiting for you to come and take your seat. And there’s where I met you. You helped make all my dreams come true. And though we are far apart. You'll always live inside my heart. I'll never forget you. Repeat.