Second Chance at Love
Second Chance at Love

That's the Way Love Goes?

by S Double 5 months ago in dating

Can you love two people?

That's the Way Love Goes?

I moved my hand slowly across his arm, and he smiled at me.

"I'm sorry, I don't know why I cant stop myself from coming here."

I tried to roll over, but he pulled me back and pressed closer to my body. the smell of his sweat and breath makes my goosebumps rise.

"You don't have to be sorry for any of this. Its my fault we keep breaking up."

His fingers danced on my back as he just kept talking. I hated myself for being here, his legs tangled in mine as he just kept talking. I tried falling asleep, but my body doesn't listen when his heat is so close. As he kept talking I put my mouth close to his neck and breathed in his scent, then put my lips to his neck. Instantly he stopped, finally. I slipped my tongue between my lips and ran it across his salty skin. He took a sharp breath and grabbed my face.

"You know I don't even remember a time when I didn't have to help everybody. When I was in school everyone was always looking to me because I was always the smartest in the room and all the."

He talked while I put all my things together and brushed out my hair. I don't even know if he realized I was leaving. He sat at his table filling out paperwork as he talked. I sat on his lap and put my arm around his neck.

"I have to go to work now," I told him, then kissed his mouth.

He tasted of weed and orange juice. He kissed me back and patted me on my butt.

"OK, but will you come back later? I can cook and we can watch a movie or something."

I kissed him again and stood up '"I'll see," I told him.

He looked a little hurt, as I walked out his door. I really need to stop seeing him, but my body is addicted to him, since the first time he touched me , holding my arm while I tried to hit his friend for touching me. But six years and four break ups later I know that being with him will never work. Our personalities don't mix, and I hate when he talks about himself. We fix it for a little, or I ignore how narcissistic he is. I know that and he knows that, but we just cant stay away from each other.

At lunch I checked my phone and find he has called me twice, I text him I'm busy, and miss him and go to meet my boyfriend for lunch. We've been together for 11 months and its like he was made for me. He is just as hard as I want him to be, always putting his foot down when I'm out of line and makes me feel like a woman. He touches me softly, but is always the man. I walked in the restaurant and he stood up, all 6'4 of his dark brown beautiful body. He owns the local gyms in the community and lives to work out. His firm hug and deep voiced greetings make me melt. I love the way he watches my body move while I talk. He asks me questions and talks about whatever I ask him about. He is genuinely interested in me, and we are so happy together. After we eat he brings me to his truck and puts me in the back seat, climbs in behind me and tells me to take off my panties. There are none to take off so he takes me like that, until we collapse on each other. I get back to work three minutes late with a smile on my face.

My current boyfriend is the kind of man a woman like me needs. I'm too strong for someone like my ex, who is always trying to say the right thing to please me but continuously fails, who whines constantly and makes me feel like I have to be the man, make all the decisions and fix everything.

Unfortunately my body is still in love with him. Hard as I try I cant stop. He smells like home, he feels like home. My current boyfriend keeps hinting at marriage and starting family, but how can I start a family when my ex is dragging me down.

"Baby you know if you just come and live with me you could save money, and I have a space for your office so you can write."

Laying on the rug in front of his fireplace eating he tried again last week to convince me.

"I know but I like to have my own space, besides this is your home."

I sat up beside him and he sighed.

"It can be our space too though, or we can get a new place together wherever you want it to be, you are here most of the week anyway so what more space you need"?

Obviously I couldn't tell him the reason I couldn't live with him is because I still fuck my ex once a week. He would probably kill me if he knew. Changing the subject I smiled and kissed him, and tried to get him to focus on something else.

I left work and went to my own apartment. I had to shower, I told my boyfriend I would cook for him tonight so I wanted enough time to get cute and start the food before he got here. I know he is the one that I should be with and pleasing him is so easy, he just wants me to be a woman for him. Look sexy, give him food, and make him cum. All things that he really loves how I do already, plus I know with him I will never have to worry about money. So why cant I get away from my under achieving, no life having, amazing in the sack ex?

How does it work?
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
S Double

Just writing to try and win the battle between the pen (or keyboard) and my mind. 

See all posts by S Double