Star Janice

I was done trying, cold as one can get, and I just managed myself to survive emotionally. I’ve been dumb, still dumb but the difference is now I know it. The last episode did not end quite well so I look towards a better; not rushing any decisions. Does the heart literally break because I could die from the pain alone? The body is lifeless when the heart beats no more; my heartbeat alone feels folklore. In this relationship, I have sworn to be your commodore. It all ends under this sun huh, guess I should have expected it. Even the ghetto deserves love and my outrageous looking pockets would be patched, I’m not far-fetched from riches. Why ghost me after all these years of being public, I hope you don’t lose direction seeking your class. Staying in the gym all day riding elliptical pedals, I’m putting myself on a pedestal. The street anthem echoes in my ear every morning, “Make money and women would come to you”. My interest grew loud for building myself until I was ready to settle with the left side.

Smoky dull, eternal yellow-brown sky ending the day; I was bipolar all day coming home from work. I guess I’m not cooking today so I’m grabbing food at the nearest fast food joint. At Marwako, in a queue, I need my order pronto. I was losing my patience until she joined the queue behind me. Trying to ignore her because my stomach needs my attention but her bright thin almond-shaped eyes played on repeat in my mind. I kept turning looking at her face, and she kept asking who this weirdo is? Moving close I said “Excuse me, do you have the time? I just want to remember the exact minute I got a crush on you.” She smiled and said nothing while fidgeting her phone. I had never believed love at first sight, so I took a pause in my mind and said to myself “No she’s just good looking”. I’m next to make an order and I gave the chance for her to buy her food. The last time I was such a gentleman was when my Ex gave me a lap dance ha-ha. She appreciates my kindness, so I said to her “You know, I had a pickup line ready to go, but you’re so hot it just left my mind”. She looks back in my eyes and laughs, I thought to myself maybe I’m doing well in a long while. She replies “I have a boyfriend”, my day couldn’t have gotten worse. I smiled and said to her “It is not my fault that I fell for you, anyone else could have. I have never seen you in the neighboorhood before so where did you come from; heaven? ”I asked her name and she introduces herself as Janice and I’m Theo I told her, she had come to visit her sister in Accra and lives a few blocks away. We got served and she had to go but I don’t know if I might see her again. I asked if she knows her maths very well and she replies yeah. I asked to add 1+1 and she replies two, divide 10 by 5 and she replies 2, then I said multiply your telephone number by one while I pulled out my phone. She was done mentioning her number and I said have a good night sweet Popsicle, I would text you tonight. It’s been the longest since I ever felt this way and she just cured me of distress because she got on my mind from that hour on.

I had only gotten home before recognizing her physique cos I was lost in her eyes, damn I thought. The night was still young, and I have been excited for meeting the girl of my dreams, I sent her a text over the phone awaiting a reply.

I was on the toilet doing my thing with my phone in hand still looking out for the message tone to ding. She finally replies YES!! My next door neighbor must be wondering what I’m excited about.

I want a place where I can call home, feel comfort and be happy to return always. I never felt comfortable returning home cos it didn’t treat me well. We got to know ourselves more during this time. She moved to visit her sister because of her toxic boyfriend. I’m talking to myself “Her abusive boyfriend drove her out and I hope I could be her comfort”.

The pale crescent moon shone through my window, brightening my face with a deep smile. I had forgotten myself and spent hours of texting in the washroom, got up from the toilet seat; took my bath, and headed to deep sleep.

The florid orange light of dawn seeped into my room, waking up full of energy as the sun. I could have dreamt of her but I can’t remember if I did, I sat on my bed searching through my mind for clues of dreamland scenes of the angel I’ve been speaking to. Took my phone and sent her a WhatsApp text message

The energy transcends to my workplace as a DevOps engineer, and my colleagues notice the smile on my face. I took Janice’s advice and finally man up to raise the middle finger at my boss just when he turned his back at me. Looking forward to your text every day gives me the calmness my soul deserves.

I’ve kept you company, you walked side by side with me, we spoke only what we understand and we’ve grown to be more than friends. Friend zoned? No, waiting on the perfect time to capitalize on this feeling and there’s nothing to stop us now. Our chat continued for weeks and months, she fell for my sweet talks and I lost my head thinking of her. She had broken up with her boyfriend and moved to her apartment in Akuse.

On a Friday morning, waking up to a tepid air; everything seemed odd. I could hear from my neighbor’s loud radio, the earth is being plagued. The World Health Organisation had announced the day before of a strange illness breaking out worldwide. I switched on my television and every channel is talking about this pandemic Covid-19. We were just getting started, world governments impose lockdowns restricting movements. I’m worried about her safety, hoping we can live together beyond fifty. I spend the whole day on the phone waiting for her to come online, Facetime till we sleep together. The world almost felt static, waking up to the same routines every day but knowing we have family and loved ones to spend every time left to survive growing stronger. I see your face on the screen, my heart screams for your touch. Feels like a mirage, so close yet so far away. I wish I had taken you to the altar earlier, tied together knowing you’re right here with me. It is Lockdown, security forces enforced measures to keep citizens safe indoors.

If I have to reach my destination, I need to avoid major checkpoints. It’s a normal Saturday except the streets are extra quiet, I prepare on mission impossible. I had to surprise her with my best cooking skills, so I take my time to bring out the chef in me.

I’ve loved traveling on my Honda fire blade, 135 minutes later I arrive at my location pretty much excited. I had left my bike with a local and tipped him to protect it till I return. I picked my backpack, boarded a canoe to the island where she waited. Meeting her for the second time was more refreshing than first, she gave me a bear hug before I could on my own words. I stretched out a rose flower from my leather jacket to her, she glowed inside out; her smile puts me in a trance. I unpacked my bag, brought out a little mat to spread on the shore right where the waves end. Setting a foldable umbrella over the mat we sat, I dished out jollof, dessert salad from an insulated icebox I had brought from home.

We talked for hours I didn’t realize the night falling. Oh, I forgot a drink in the icebox, “I would gladly serve you” as she searches the icebox. She pours me a glass of Merlot Palma, we sat on the beach alone feeling like the world belonged to us. I picked up wood pegs on the beach to set up a fire to sit around, the stars came out early today; sequin-silver bright occidental star appearing south-east. This star is Janice; naming it after her while we watched the sky and listened to ‘Have I told you lately by Rod Stewart’ playing on the background on a JBL Bluetooth music box. The thought of love is beautiful; the actions outstanding. I’m standing waiting for the damsel I could fall for, while she’s yet to come; I keep fantasying about our time together.